A Visit to Mariana

Mariana is a young lady who I feel is an important part of our family. She came to America with very little command of the English language, so I volunteered to tutor her throughout most of her grade school years. To help ensure her success, I also encouraged her to come to our house after school so she could finish her homework under my tutelage and interact with my five kids, socially. It didn’t take very long for all six to become a close pack of friends scavenging my pantry and playing in the back yard. They all grew up together with Mariana taking on the role of another sister.

Eventually, my oldest kids entered high school, Mariana became a middle schooler and my youngest ones remained in elementary school. Naturally, the kids drifted apart a bit and stopped spending so much time together. Nevertheless, the underlying bond of fondness was there, and we all often reminisced about the wonderful times we spent with her.

Erik was particularly fond of Mariana, perhaps because they were the closest in age. When he finally got his own wheels, he was eager to take her out from time to time. Even when she had a boyfriend, Erik wanted to “hang out” with her. He enjoyed her companionship so much.

Mariana was particularly devastated by Erik’s death. She wished, as so many of us did, that she had spent more time with him. RIght after his passing, Erik expressed concern for her through the medium, Vicky Warren. While channeling him, Vicky said, “Erik is concerned about a young girl with a name that sounds like Maria, but it’s a longer name, a Latin name. He plans on visiting her in her dreams to provide much needed comfort.”

I hesitated to relay this information to Mariana, because I wasn’t sure how open she’d be considering her religious upbringing. What if she found this information disturbing? What if it did more harm than good?

Before I could make up my mind about how to handle this message, Mariana called me. She sounded excited as she recounted Erik’s first visit to her. I asked her to email the experience to me. Here is a description in her own words:

“I have to tell you about a dream I had this morning. I had to wake up really early this morning to go finish a test during 1st period because I have late arrival. My alarm went off at 6:50am but of course, I turned it off and went back to sleep for about 25 minutes. In those 25 minutes, I had a dream about him!! I don’t really remember all of it but I remember I was walking in my room and I saw the blinds moving like opening and shutting really fast and I was scared. Then I received a call from you and you told me he was on the phone. I could hear his voice through the phone and we were talking. I don’t remember what he was saying but I just remember I was crying because I was so happy to hear his voice. So then I remember telling him I wanted to keep talking to him more but I had to go get ready to go finish a test at school and that I needed him there with me and didn’t want to leave him and he said in a calm voice “I’m always there with you”… and I felt so comfortable and so safe. Like I could feel him around me. I don’t really know how to explain what I felt but after that I woke up and actually started getting ready for school. Isn’t that weird? I wish I could remember every single detail but I’m really bad at remembering dreams. It felt SO real that throughout the day, he kept popping into my head randomly like he was actually with me during the whole school day, and I kept thinking I had actually talked to him.”

Dreams are the most common ways our departed loved ones communicate with the living. I suppose it’s easier for them to engage us when our consciousness leaves our body during sleep and is not cluttered with the constant barrage of thoughts that busy the unquiet mind. Again, what’s different about these visitation dreams is that they are more tangible. They feel real. They provide comfort. My hope is that I will eventually be able to invite such visits from Erik while I’m awake and that other grieving parents, family and friends will strive to do the same.

My mind is my own worse enemy. It’s made this last week a particularly dark one. Thoughts of missing, of loving, of what once was and what will never be are instruments of torture. They are the bamboo splinters thrust slowly and deeply under my nails. They are the eagle that picks away at Prometheus’s liver while he is bound in chains to a rock. I, too, feel like a modern day Prometheus. The wound is deep and painful and the chains of grief are enslaving. Hopefully, time will provide the key to the lock binding those chains. With any luck, I can, like Prometheus, turn this tragedy into a gift. As he gave mankind the gift of fire, I pray that I can give the bereaved comfort and hope.

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Elisa Medhus

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  • Last night Michael was in my dreams. He did not speak, but was looking my way from a distance and he was beaming at me and looked so handsome, almost radiant. It was a very comforting dream and I can’t stop thinking about it. Is he telling me he’s ok?

    • Wow, that sounds typical of a dream visitation. I can see his face now…a very knowing smile of wisdom on it, right?

  • Yes and deep contentment.

  • I just want to let you know that I have been reading your blogs. I just never leave comments, I’m not very good with words. I hope you and your family are getting better. Take care 🙂

  • This is crazy, my dreams of Erik occur mostly in that 30-45 minutes that I sleep in after my alarm goes off. Oh, and by the way, Erik is a real ladies man in heaven now I think, I have been lonely lately and in all my dreams Erik keeps setting me up with all these girls that I daydream of. I miss my best friend.

  • Yahaira Florentino

    Hi. I’m sorry for your loss. I hav many many male cousin that have died in cars or motors accidents and everybody in that town think it is a family curse. Now either of us want to have a boy. Well back in feb-2-09 my very beloved cousin willfredy did in a car accident back in my country and i was performing in DC, and couldnt go and be at teh funeral, that i think made my grief worse, i couldent slep or eat or stop crying. During the first week i wasnt able to live a normal life and then one day i saw him playing in the clouds very happy and he told me ” tel mom im alreay here and we’ll meet here” since then i stop feeling sad. That dream was so real and i wasnt completly asleep remember was trying to. Well I dream about him every so often but his mom dont belive in this. Most of my family think deads are slleping awaiting for the final judment day. I really appreciate your sharing. LOVE

    • Aw, Yahaira, how gifted you are to have been so receptive to your cousin! Willfredy didn’t die in the sense that he’s gone forever. He just opened the door and went from one dimension to the other. He’s back home, while we’re really on a stage at a school play, playing roles that will help us evolve and grow. He’s there waiting for you, and it sounds like he’s sending you messages so that you might spread the news to other family members. They should know that souls don’t sleep and wait for judgment day. The only judgment a soul undergoes if the judgment he or she delivers. God is without judgment. Even Jesus and other Masters agree with that, but organized religion distorted things a bit. Is there anything I can do to help you?

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