Are You Lonely?

Me: Why do some of us feel lonely? Is that along the same lines (as in yesterday’s post) or are there other reasons?

Erik: No, you can totally, straight out be human for centuries and have that lonely feeling. That could be that you have such an intense memory or connection to the afterlife, Heaven, Home, whatever you want to call it, and you’re bringing those memories and those morals, those feelings back into a human life. And you just can’t fucking connect to people like that, you know? People can be mean on Earth. We aren’t really mean where I am.

Jamie (to Erik): What do you want to call that?

Erik: Home, man! It’s Home.

Jamie (to Erik): All right. Home.

Me: All right. So that’s real home, obviously.

Erik: Home base, man! Think of it as home base playing a game of fucking Hide and Seek.

Jamie and I laugh. What an analogy.

Jamie: So he’s on home base, and you’re out there playing Hide and Seek.

Erik: I’ll fucking find ya.

Jamie laughs.

Me: Uh oh.

Erik: If you’re watching this, I’ll find you. I’ll lay some pranks down; I’ll interact with you so that you can’t dismiss what we’re presenting.

Me: I’ll tell you; he’s been playing so many pranks—

Jamie gasps and covers her mouth.

Me: Uh oh. What did he say now?

Jamie (giggling): No, I just told him, ‘You know, Erik, some people don’t want that sort of experience so you really need to be, you know, kind. Be good. Let people evolve the way they want.’ And he goes, “Yeah, I’m a little fucking tired of that. “And I was like, ‘Oh my god.’

Me: Uh oh.

Jamie: He has been pulling pranks, hasn’t he?

Me: Uf! Well, what do you mean by that, “You’re tired of it”?

Erik: Sometimes you gotta push just a little. What do you think I’m going to do? I’m not going to hurt anybody! I’m not going to take them out of their skin or anything. I’m just going to push them a little bit. Challenge their mind.

Me: Well, are some people lonely because they’ve come to be teachers and students come in and pass through their lives? Kind of like the pets we’ve had in house—they come into the front door and right to the pet cemetery in the back yard.

Jamie opens her mouth and lets out a little sympathetic gasp.

Me: Is it kind of like that?

Erik: Yeah, you can describe it like that. You know, again, it’s hard to talk in general about it because there are so many reasons why and life—a human life—is so individual that it’s difficult to talk in terms of being general. I’m always going to do my best, but, yeah. It’s like that.

Me: So how can you not feel lonely? Is it just knowing the reasons that would help or is there anything they can do?

Erik: Sometimes it can be a chemical thing and they need their hormones balanced or the chemicals that are being released in their brain—they need help with that. You know, medicines are fucking awesome these days and it’s only going to get better. So we can lean on that. That might be the absolute big piece of the puzzle. Boom. All of a fucking sudden, you’re aligned.

Jamie: Say that ten times fast!

Me: Really!

Erik: But it could be that—it’s not so much the physical body but the energetic body, cuz you know we have four different bodies. We have the mental body, the emotional body, the physical body and the spiritual body. And we gotta get all four of these bodies aligned all on the same page talking, communicating, knowing where each of them are to really feel grounded in life. Crisp, clean, clear, motivated, whatever terms you want to put on that shit. It’s called grounding. Being centered. And if you can’t, if you get three together, but your mind is off in left field, that’s not going to do you any fucking good. You’re still gonna feel like a—

Jamie bursts out laughing.

Erik: –out of sorts freak.

Jamie and I laugh, and Jamie shakes her head.

Erik (playfully): Come on, Jamie. Move on!

Jamie: All right; all right.

Me: So are there any ways to make people feel grounded?

Erik: Yeah. First of all, I would start teaching them that they have four fucking roommates living with them. The mind, emotions, body and soul. And find some specialist or some friend or some location and source—something that they can lean on and learn a little bit about each roommate.

Erik widens his eyes and thrusts his face forward. A “so there” move.

Me: Okay.

Erik: Once you do that, you’re going to learn how to groom, maintain and take care of each of these —be able to get them into one room so that they embrace each other. Boom. You got success; I don’t care what the fuck is wrong with you. If you can do that, you’re grounded every single day. Now, I think, from observing, what’s most difficult for (air quotes) humans and their emotional needs is that they can do it if they’re in a calm environment, but as soon as they get rawled up or in an intense disagreement or some kind of urgency, they don’t know how to tap into all four bodies immediately. They can only do one, like, “How do I feel?” or “What do I think?” but not like, “How’s my body responding. You’ll ignore. One takes the sacrifice and follows a specific direction with the other. You know, not so sharp. If you guys want to reach that level where you’re experiencing life to its fullest, get to know your roommates, man.

Me: Okay.


Dear Reader,

The journey on which you’re about to embark will take you through stories that are deeply personal and involves a relationship between a mother and her son.

As a physician raised by two atheists, I had no personal belief system about life after death. In a word, I was a confirmed skeptic. As my journey progressed, my mind opened. It is my sincerest hope that yours will open as well and that you will have a greater understanding of your own life and what’s to come ahead.

Although Erik sometimes paints a rosy picture of the afterlife, time and time again he stresses that suicide is not the answer to one’s problems. If you struggle, please understand that the information in my blog and my book is no substitute for professional help. Please click here for a list of resources for help when you find yourself considering taking your own life. Know that they are readily available when you feel that hopelessness and despair that many of us feel from time to time in our lives.

I refuse all donations and ad revenue on the blog. It is my dream to one day establish a nonprofit organization that delivers a variety of spiritual services for those who have lost loved ones to suicide and cannot afford that assistance on their own. It’s a mission of love, sacrifice, and dedication.

Love and light,


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Elisa Medhus

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