Here is the next of several submissions to the “Ask Erik” page. As you can see, we’ve kept him very busy, but I’m sure he adores the attention.
Bethany’s question:
In 1996 my uncle committed suicide and my family seemed to fall apart after this. My dad has been in deep depression since, and his children got taken out of our lives without notice. I recently got to see one of my cousins I hadn’t seen in almost 15 years now and those questions pop in my head daily “what really happened?” and “why?” Lots of people believe he would not have done that. He was making his way to the top of XXX XXXXXX and his personality seemed too strong willed. He was a XXXXXXXX in the military. We were all in complete shock. I would like to see if he is there with Erik and maybe any information as to why he did it. It was the most random thing that happened in our family, and we can’t seem to put the pieces together.
Here is his name: Rafael XXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXX. Born XX/XX/50, died XX/XX/96. He was born in McAllen, TX and died in Angleton where he lived much of the last part of his life.
Question posed to Erik:
Bethany, age 23, says her uncle died in 1996. She says her family fell apart after this and has never been quite the same. What happened and why? His name is Rafael. He was born in 1950 in McAllen, and he died in Angleton.
Kim: I’m just listening to Erik.
Me: Okay.
Erik: This is connected with sexual issues, Mom. He was concerned about people finding out. He killed himself. It was impetuous. It was not planned long-term. He’s been very conflicted since the time he was like 14, but he didn’t really have any intentions of committing suicide, none. It had to do with sexual issues coming to light, and he was ashamed. That’s why he did it.
Me: Is he doing okay?
Erik: He says he is FABULOSO, Mom. He’s still here in Heaven. He hasn’t returned yet to his next lifetime. You know what he’s doing in Heaven, Mom? He’s working as a professional chef.
Me: Oh!
Erik: And he’s telling me he loves to garden.
Kim: It sounds like a Facebook profile!
Erik: He says he loves being in Heaven where everyone is nonjudgmental, and he has nothing to say about his family being judgmental. It’s just that he can be whoever he wants and whatever he wants in Heaven, and it’s not always like that on the earthly plane. He wants to comment on all the love and support he got from his family. Wow, they were a very close-knit family! He’s saying he misses them, and he looks forward to them getting to Heaven. But he’s very busy and very happy. He’s fulfilled.
Me: Good. Okay, so why did the family fall apart so much after he died?
Erik: Because this family put great stock in knowing what each other was doing at all times and knowing, you know, what the uncles, the brothers, the sons, the cousins, everybody, big family all real close-knit, and they got together all the time and they talked all the time. For someone in their ranks to do this without sharing it with anyone just rocked them to their core. They’re thinking, ‘If he can do it, who else will do it? Which one of us is going to be next?’ A lot of them believe everything happens in threes. They’re freaking out about who’s going to be the next to die. Of everyone in the family, they never would have thought it would be him because he was always like easy going, you know, didn’t take things real seriously, had a funny sense of humor, was always there for everybody else. He gave no one else any impression that this would happen, that he was even thinking about this, that he was depressed or that anything was even wrong. They thought he had a charmed life.
Me: Well, it’s good to know he’s happy and at peace now.
Erik: He is.
Me: This may bring up more questions from Bethany, Erik.
Erik: That’s okay. Bring ’em on.
Me: I love you, Baby Boy.
Erik: I know, Mom. I love you too. Tell everybody I love them.
Me: Every day, darling, every day.
Bethany’s response:
Wow, thank you for that! That is very interesting that he is a chef and loves to garden! He loved to bbq and throw big parties and cook while here and everyone in my family loves their yards lol. He was the last one that we expected to ever do this, and its somewhat a relief that XXXXXXXX didn’t do it. As far as the sexual issues, I’m not very sure as he never let anyone know about it. Always the wife and kids kinda guy, but I’ll ask his brothers and sisters and see what they think. I hope all is getting well and i enjoy reading the blog.
My response:
He might not be gay. It could be something as simple as sexual fantasies that he considered sinful. There are all sorts of “sexual perversions” for heterosexuals too, most of them have roots in past life experiences.
Bethany’s response:
I spoke with my grandmother about the reading. She did say he loved roses very much, and now that I think back to that time, he had them on the side of his house and no one was to touch them lol.
In this submission, I have omitted a few sentences that might be too identifying. Protecting the family, as always, is crucial to this process. However, none of these take away from the gift that Erik has given us all…the gift that allows us to break the bonds of our paltry five sense perception and all of the limits with which it shackles us. Through Erik and Kim, we have access to answers and insights that would otherwise remain out of our grasp. Sometimes these answers give birth to more questions, but as you can see, Erik is willing and ready to help us. It’s nice to have an “inside man,” isn’t it? Our Heaven’s Gate, our spiritual window. Let’s all take some time today to send him our prayers, our love and our appreciation.
His response also brings up important questions: Why do we judge others and, even in the absence of judgment, why do we feel judged? I don’t profess to have the answers to these, but I do know that judgment of others is not our job; it’s the job of the universe, of karma, if you will. So perhaps we can take something from this to incorporate into our daily lives. From now on, I’m going to make a commitment to live a judgment-free life. Not only will I try (gulp) not to pass judgment on a single soul, stranger or otherwise, I will go out of my way to make those around me feel loved and accepted for who and what they are. It won’t be an easy task, but it is one that is vital to the progress of my soul and the paths of those I meet.
