Here’s another post from guest blogger and medium, Kate Sitka. Thanks, Kate!
I’ve got a little prank to blame on Erik right now, we’ll see if he claims credit. I was listening to a podcast and the volume kept turning down. At first I thought it was an issue with the recording itself, or possibly my earphones. But after the fifth time of adjusting the volume, I picked up the ipod and watched as the volume bar rolled down before my eyes, and it actually fought me as I tried to turn the volume back up. Erik’s been poking around lately, so I’m inclined to blame this on him as a bid for attention (or a smack upside the head.)
Erik, was that you? Naw! That doesn’t sound like me at all. If it was me, I’d be turning the volume UP! You don’t turn the funk down, ba-beh, you turn it up!
(Erik is being a funk artist with a base guitar, a huge floppy hat and massive, multi-colour dread locks sprouting all over the place. He’s showing himself as a psychedelic hallucination, like a shadow of George Clinton superimposed over Erik’s skinny frame.)
Here’s a picture of George Clinton, in case you don’t know him:
Was that a faulty ipod then, or was it someone else?
I’m not a tattletale! *grin*!
Alrighty then! HAPPY CHRISTMAS you undead weirdo! Here I’ve put all that effort into describing his funk costume, and now he’s gone zombie on me. (There’s a cultural obsession that I’ve never really understood.) Erik says, That’s ‘cause you grew up in the 90s when vampires were all the rage. You’re too cool for Zombies, Kate, that’s your problem. You’re undead classist – we’ve gotta bust the caste system of the undead!
(This is all really funny / ironic because of course the *actual* dead aren’t ranked – Erik hates it when I explain his jokes.) They’ll GET IT, he insists.
Talking to Erik can sometimes feel like I’ve just acquired Tourette syndrome along with Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder. Where the hell were we??
Ha! He’s playing one of my favourite Beatles songs, “Revolution”, which leads into our theme for today’s piece: New Years Revolutions!
The truly funky thing about New Years, (funky = supremely cool – and he’s back to being Funk Erik now – he says Funk is the “cool” hippies.) Everyone’s in this Revolutionary headspace. It’s a time when everyone’s lookin’ at the future together for all the things that can change, all the good shit that can happen, how their lives can change, how the world can change!
I dig it.
The people feel Empowered, man. That’s the REVOLUTION, when people feel the power in their own hands, and the see good shit in the future with their own hearts!
That’s deep, y’all, can you feel it?
What’s cool about New Years is people just forget – they just fuckin’ forget all of the shit in the past. For a night, they let it go, they drop it, and they celebrate the potential of the future!
Do you know that most of the time, people worry about the negative potential of the future? That’s why I fucking LOVE NEW YEARS EVE, man! It’s all about the GOOD SHIT that’s coming down the pipes, and people really feel it, they just KNOW it’s there! I love it!
Y’all know what it is, exactly, that you let go of on New Years eve? You let go of all the shit that you think was done to you by someone else. (He’s really dwelling on the simplicity of letting go, it’s not an intellectual thing, it’s more like dropping a bag of something heavy.) New Years is a time to set everything down and you can decide if you want to pick it up again in the morning. Some people pick that shit back up because it feels familiar, it feels safe: it’s THEIR shit. It’s part of who they are. An’ that’s cool, if you want to/ need to pick it back up.
Just *feel* the supreme funkiness of feeling free of it. Just enjoy it, get reeeeeeeeaaaal comfortable with that feelin’. That’s a feeling you can practice. That’s a feeling that is the MOST NATURAL state of being – that optimism of New Years eve.
(Erik switches to being blonde, on a desert sand dune, oh yeah he’s ridiculously cut, wearing a white loose pajamas with the wind blowing his hair and shirt back. This one’s familiar, he’s done it before.)
This is for the hamster-wheel minds, those beautiful, hard-working people who TRY to meditate, and they just can’t get there. (Gives me the feeling of sexual frustration, thanks for that, dude.) It’s like, if you’re meditating and you’re trying to get to Nirvana, you’re imagining this feeling of bliss that’s like getting off. I’m tellin’ you, it’s more like that feeling on New Year’s eve, when everyone around you is a friend and everyone sees the good in each other and the world. That’s a lot easier to get to than climbing some internal mountain of spiritual ecstasy – and THAT is why you –
Ha, okay I’ll describe the visual he just gave me.
There’s a spiritual leader in front of a podium talking to a group of several hundred people. The guy’s talking and talking, blah-blah-blah-blah – and there’s Erik right behind him making this funny face with his eyes squeezed shit and his teeth sticking out making this “jerk off” motion with his hands!
The interpretation is that sometimes when you hear someone talk about spirituality and you just get the sense they’re stroking themselves with their words – it’s because they *are* – but they’re doing it because they’re thinking of “enlightenment” as a sexual-like release. They have this desperate feeling of enormous spiritual frustration.
Spiritual Blue Balls
Thank you, Erik. Oh awesome, he’s showing me the Christmas Ornament version of it. Fantastic. An’ there’s this long one right here –
Yeah we all know where you’re going with that, little E.
Ha, he wants me to erase the “little E” part, says it’ll give folks the wrong impression! Hey dude, you’re the one who keeps trying to show me –
Okay, so what were we talking about Kate? You’re kind of genital-obsessed, it’s distracting. Seriously, girl, you need to work on that.
You want to talk Tantra?
OOO sure, let’s talk tantra. The lights just flickered, that’s funny. Turning down the lights to set the mood?
I’m bringing up tantra ‘cause it’s a way people have combined meditation with sexual release. For some people who are *really* hard-wired to their bodies, tantra is a great way to get to that feeling of spiritual bliss – to like, tack on sexual gratification with meditation. Or to use their drive for sexual release to help them get there, spiritually. That’s why it’s so weird when religions try to separate sexuality from spirituality.
I get it though – some people who think a lot about spiritual things, like what it all means, the state of the world, of humanity, where we all came from – those thoughts can really suck all your energy into your head. Some of these folks spend so much time thinking about this shit that they get disconnected from the lower parts of their body. The polite way to say this is they get “ungrounded”. The RUDE way to say this is they’re cold fish! LIKE A FROZEN COD!!! So then those cold fish go and explain to other people that if you’re gonna be spiritual, it results in this disconnection from the body, and if you’re doing “God” right, you won’t get horny.
Well, while a temporary loss of sex drive can be a SIDE EFFECT of getting all up in your head (and it’s not just spiritual stuff, you can just be all in your head with worries too, or depression) it’s not really a state worth actively seeking out. (Shows me a fading willy with a disappointed, slide-whistle sound.)
But for other people, trying to make meditation a part of sex is going to KILL their boners. Lady or man.
(ha haa, lady-boner)
Some people try their whole lives to “become enlightened” – like it’s the best orgasm they can have with the universe, AND IT IS! But you don’t have to live a hundred lifetimes to get it, not when you can realize how simple it actually is: it’s like New Years Eve.
New beginnings. RIGHT NOW is the time to try it. It’s just a moment that’s made so powerful and tangible because we’re surrounded by humans all thinking and feeling the same reasonably-optimistic things. So piggy-back off all the good vibes around you and see where it gets you!
“I’m gonna quit smoking, I’m gonna lose weight” – these are all things that you can see yourself doing in the perfect optimism of New Years eve, so just fucking enjoy it and sit with it, get at home with that *feeling* and try and revisit that feeling more than once a year.
(The song’s wrapping up with the lyrics, “You know it’s gonna be alright.”)
Here’s a link to the video of the Fab Four playing Revolution: LINK
Erik’s closing deep thought: You know what a revolution is, right? It’s a circle, it’s *returning*. Get it?
Happy New Year, beautiful People! Erik says, LOVE YOU!!!!!!
Kate Sitka is a spirit medium and animal communicator located in Tofino, BC. To learn more about her and her work, please visit her professional website tofinopsychic.com and her personal blog psychicintraining.com