What Death Feels Like

Me: I want to tell you that you’ve been very busy pranking and visiting the blog members as we talked about before, but I also want to thank you, because there are a couple of them who have been struggling, and you reached out to help them.

Erik (tapping his chest): Thanks for saying that, Mom.

Me: Aw. Well, we’re going to ask some questions about the nature of death. We’re going to have a very cheerful subject now!

Jamie giggles.

Jamie: Okay.

Me: A lot of people want to know: what does death feel like, Erik? What is it?

Jamie: He just kind of looks at me, widens his eyes, cocks his head and says, “Uh, I can only speak for myself.” Well have you heard others talk about theirs, as well? Can you give us some examples?

Erik (with great fanfare): Well, ladies—

We both laugh.

Erik: Well, Mom, the way death felt for me was more in a, oh hell, I don’t know how to explain it! It’s just, for me, I was in pain, and I was trying to remedy that myself, and then it was just like, lights out. Like going to sleep super fast.  I don’t have a feeling attached to it. It was more like a process. It just—it happened.  If you want to pull in other people, we can do that, but I’ve heard some people say that it was just like falling asleep, and when they come to, it really felt like they were in a dream, but it’s not a dream. They really don’t seem to catch on til they recognize that the people who are surrounding them are people who have passed on. There are some people who ease out of their body. They remain this consciousness the entire time. They know that their body has died. They step out or float up or pull away from their body. They look at their body, but there’s no transcending; there’s no crossing into the light or whatever the hell you wanna call it.

Jamie chuckles, shakes her head and says, “Oh, Erik.”

Erik (rolling hand over hand): C’mon, Jamie. Keep up!

Me: So, is it ever painful for people?

Erik: The physical body is painful, but the act of death is not. Leaving your physical body is not.

Jamie (giggling): He goes, “Is going to sleep ever painful?”

Me: No, I love it. It’s a joy! But like when people fall out of buildings, for example, and they hit the pavement, doesn’t that hurt?

Erik: Again, you have to take it per individual experience. Sometimes, before they even jump out of that window, for whatever cause that it is, their soul could already be out of their body, right? The—

Jamie (chuckling): He said “the afterlife,” and I go, ‘Who does this?’

Erik: Ah, shit. Angels, if you want to call it that. Higher beings, God, you know. You gotta really listen to this material and shape the terms to fit your religious beliefs. This way, I think you can understand more of what we’re saying. I know I get a lot of flack for the language that I use, but, come on, you gotta understand, that’s my touch. That’s my flair.

Me: That’s right. We know it’s you.

Erik: Show me an American that doesn’t know the words that I use. Cut me some slack. We’re talking about those who jump or fall, most of the time—cuz I’m just speaking in general, so again, I’m going to take an individual experience—that spirit is already being removed from the physical body before they hit the pavement. The lesson is done. The act of—

Jamie: I’m going to see if I understand what he was saying.

Erik: The act of the death.


Jamie (to Erik): Erik, you can’t backtrack like that. It confuses me.

I chuckle.

Erik: If we’re taking the example of leaving a window—there are many different reasons for leaving a window. It could be to end their life willingly. It could be to leaver a horrific situation such as a fire, you know, or collapse of a building, It could have been accidentally falling. It could be any of these cases. That matters in how their exit plays out. In general, the exit is the act of the falling, not hitting the pavement.

Me: Ah!

Erik: I hope this makes sense, because it’s not truly the impact of the physical body where death occurs. It is for things like a stroke.

Jamie (to Erik, clarifying): Aneurysm?

Erik: Aneurysm. Heart attack. In these instances, it’s what causes the body to separate from the soul but not so much in the case of falling, and, again, not so much in the case of any other kinds of accidents such as impact accidents, car accidents, nature—

Jamie (to Erik, confused): Nature?

Me: Like being eaten by a bear.

Jamie (laughing): That’s the first animal that came to my mind! He’s like, “Jamie, you’re morbid!” And I said, ‘I’m not morbid!’ But he was talking about more of falling out of a tree, losing your footing while climbing, slipping off a mountain, rock, avalanche, things of that nature.


Dear Reader,

The journey on which you’re about to embark will take you through stories that are deeply personal and involves a relationship between a mother and her son.

As a physician raised by two atheists, I had no personal belief system about life after death. In a word, I was a confirmed skeptic. As my journey progressed, my mind opened. It is my sincerest hope that yours will open as well and that you will have a greater understanding of your own life and what’s to come ahead.

Although Erik sometimes paints a rosy picture of the afterlife, time and time again he stresses that suicide is not the answer to one’s problems. If you struggle, please understand that the information in my blog and my book is no substitute for professional help. Please click here for a list of resources for help when you find yourself considering taking your own life. Know that they are readily available when you feel that hopelessness and despair that many of us feel from time to time in our lives.

I refuse all donations and ad revenue on the blog. It is my dream to one day establish a nonprofit organization that delivers a variety of spiritual services for those who have lost loved ones to suicide and cannot afford that assistance on their own. It’s a mission of love, sacrifice, and dedication.

Love and light,


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Elisa Medhus

  • Dan

    Really interesting. The being pulled from your body before you actually hit the ground seems to correlate to certain NDE’s i’ve read about where people have been in sudden accidents. Kind of makes you feel better for those people who had to jump out of the twin towers on 9/11.

    • Donna

      Yes, that is exactly what I was thinking. Great post! Thanks Elisa and Erik. I have always wondered about that. It makes it all a bit less scary.

  • Mary Beth

    That’s consistent with what my son has shared (through Jamie). He died in a car accident last year. It happened really suddenly. He remembers feeling an impact (pain in his head and side), and then he was just standing in a place that was all white. He said he was just *there* for what seemed like quite a long moment, while he was trying to process what had just happened. And then people started showing up, people that he never met, but somehow knew … and then they started hugging and there were just hugs and hugs. He had gone over and over it in his head, and seemed still somewhat confused as to what had actually happened.

    His physical body died by drowning, so thank God his Spirit exited before that happened.

    • Elijah

      Thank you for sharing your story. So sorry for the loss of your son. It helps so much hearing these stories; so that we can’t release the fear of death. So wonderful to know that people show up for you & start hugging you & all. Thank you again for sharing….. it helps others so much.

      • Elijah

        i meant to say ….. so we can release the fear of death 🙂
        Thank you again for your story & how it will help others.
        Again sorry for the loss of your son. May the angels walk with you 24/7 till u are re-united with your son in heaven 🙂
        Much Love & Appreciation for sharing your story.

  • Ceridwen777

    Great post as usual! I’d like to add here that death isn’t the only time your soul leaves your body…I was in a couple of serious bicycle accidents, one where I was riding down a nice long hill and a car came out of an ally to my right and broadsided me. They were supposed to stop, as I was on a main street, but didn’t. I got one glimpse of the driver and her daughter (they both looked straight ahead – didn’t even see me – and they had a blank, zombie-like look, sort of “un-conscious”, like they were not really in their bodies.

    Anyway, the next thing I remember I was on the road (I had NO feeling of impact!), with my head about a foot away from oncoming traffic coming down the hill – and before my mind could process anything, my body just took over and rolled me out of the way just in time (of course now I know that I have some “kick-ass” Guides and Angels who I’m sure pulled me out of the way!)

    My bike was all twisted up, and I’m sure she made a fast getaway, and the weird thing was that nobody stopped to see if I was okay! It was probably rush hour, and that street is pretty busy with cars, but there were no pedestrians either…so I ended up walking my bike to my workplace to rest and clean up. I was just a bit bruised and scratched up, but nothing major…

    Another time when I was about 8, the brakes went out on a bike I was riding down the hill in my back yard and went across a road and into a deep ditch. Again I felt no impact…and when I came too and looked up, several people were up on the edge of the road by the ditch, staring and pointing at me and asking if I was okay…they pointed to my left wrist, which was dislocated, still inside the skin but broken and sticking out at a weird angle. I felt nothing, which I’m sure was endorphins or something.

    So that’s two examples of many that I can recall where my conscienceless left my body before impact (or I was pulled out by may Guides/Angels – not sure which)…

  • MikeHulse

    Oh yes we have been pranked numerous times. Putting things down turning away and back again to find things have gone. Turning the tv off. Even getting a visit from a Red Admiral butterfly, which then decided to fly exactly out the same window as it came in albeit banging it’s head on the way out lol

  • julia

    I cany believr i’m still here, but I hope this happens with me, because the way my heart feels now, its like I want to throe up and i’m being choked and electrocuted through my chesy and back and aems I keep telling mywself to look forward tomy death, because one side keeos telling me, youll feel sp good afterwards plus youll have, be, do and see everything you want plus ,more. youll never be lonely again and youll have friends that will not deceieve you, and you can create the fantasy worlds you always thought about/ and when its time for everyone else you know, you can show them the great things you’ve made. I juse want to fall asleep and not feel ot be aware of anything until I wake up in a bed surrounded by loved ines, anf erik of coursw.

    • Patrick De Haan

      It will be a long time from now; you are still here for very good reason and yes, you will go home, a long time from now, as easily as you fall asleep.

      • julia

        wisg I could. i’n close to death of a weord illness thars been weakening my whole body making me feel like i’m always holfing mt breath and sqteezing my heart and ribs, yet its refusing to allow me to sleep/

      • Elijah

        Julia….. If you can visulize white feathers covering your body & flooding your home. I many times in my early morning mediatation cover the entire earth with white feathers. Symbolic of angels & the white light. I am praying for you. if you can; stop speaking of this illness & it is darn hard… I’ve been the walking dead many times.
        Drink water, water, water. Pray every breath you can. Some of my indian family say the most wounded & sick are the most powerful…. the wounded healer. I’ve been thru deaths doors more times than i can count. I am still here. I am praying dear friend. Hang on. I and i know i don’t spell & write worth a flip ? But, just don’t care…lol.
        I have suffered countless head injuries & brain damage;
        and it is a miracle i can even get words out. Took a long time.

      • Shannon

        Julia, I am sorry your body is dying, and in the process, you are experiencing such profound discomfort and a lack of rest. I am sending you love and patience and peace for your remaining time on Earth. Hugs to you.

      • julia

        thank you. I was never particularly strong in body or mind, but now I know true strength because of true weakness. I wouldn’t wish this on anybody. not even hitler. I only hope that when I go back home, I can pick up where I left off, and when it comes time for everyone else who knew me, I can show them the real me, and I can show them thhe wonderful things we/I/they can do/go. my only good friend that stayed is handicapped, and she claims tobe a medium, but judging by things she said, I don’t think its true. but she also expressed interest in us forming a caspar/wendy type team. I don’t know how that’s going to come about.

    • Elijah

      I pray for you Julia. Patrick is so right. You are here for a reason. If you have some $$$ to work with healers, there are so amazing healers that can clear & burn off these lower energies that are plaging you. And sweetie we all have had lower energies to deal with. i had a mess as big as anyones. Hang in there, there is prayer & love for you here.

      • julia

        ok, I promise this is my last ramble. actually, its not just my heart, but most of my systems. an irreversible deterioration. whatever it is, they’ve done their best, they’ve done all they can. but I do need to stop talking about it, as I realize I;m not the first child to die. this explains why all my life ive been bombarded with heart attacks in media over my life, and could never imaginemyself getting old, or even as an adult. but maybe my contract was to come to this place to experience loneliness, separation, disappointment, etc, because my whole life, my home environment was loving and idealistic, but also so abrasive, and everyonewas always bigger and older and they were always so busy, so I never really formed a bond. same with friends. everyone was so…idk, but because of my raising, it was like everyone around me instinctively cold shouldered and avoided like I had 25 heads. later I found out that they thought I was the snotty one. and things that were so normal and obvious and expected for everyone, were always somehow lost on me/illogical and foreign to me. but I took the starseed quiz and I have abdolutelt no chaeacteristics. I hoped and wished and prayed for many things to be over, but it was to no avail. funny, because my family is religious, but I can tell theres also a lot of questioning, and no belief in anything on this blog. to be honest, I wouldntve either if I hadn’t come across this blog by chance after my science teacher said theres no life after death, which started mmy search about a little while before my illness/deterioration began, although its funny, while I doubted all that, I always had this insanrly huge interest in mythology, fantasy, magic, etc. what makes this even harder is that I was extremely healthy in lifestyle for almost 10 years, like steve jobs. I mean, that’s why I was so afraid to take any medicine or alchol or drugs or smoking or even circus rides because of the way theyd make me feel and because of what it might do to me. plus I had so much potential in all the arts and could very quickly pick up a paintbrush or musical instrument or animation program…and my imagination was HUGE. I was planning a huge career that would see me finally rise up that sick little preemie image, and I was always in bad shape in one form or another since before I was born.years ago, they thought I had the beginnigs of a panic disorder, so they medicated me without even checking. a few months ago was when things started getting really bad, so they checked it out and found this. a misdiagnosis. whether it was my destiny, or error, I don’t want to think about. but damn, I am visualizing so hard what its like to be free from all this. where id like to end up when I go Home…yet I have no clue what to expect, and that’s scary. but if I do have guides/angels, I hope they know what I’d like, and what I need, even if I don’t. I don’t know anything beyond this earth and my human body/perceptions, and I am scared as hell for what I might feel or not feel, like heart stopping and not being able to breathe, or not seeing people or voices or places. I don’t want to be floating in wide open space with just silent shimmering balls, not being able to breathe, not being able to feel a body…that sounds awful! hell, ive never even passed out of been out of body before, and I heard that that process in itself is uncomfortable. I was so obsessed with trying to live a normal life and what other people regard as normal. the only things ive learned on this earth are what I want/need, and that the rules of attraction and those that worked for everyone else, didn’t seem to apply to me or anyone else I knew, like a 5 year old girl who died of cancer after 5 years of relentless praying. and i’m not talking about material posessions. but thank you.

      • anon

        I think theyre deleting her posts.

      • anon

        and they just deleted a very important reply about what she fears.
        Julia: I don’t want to be floating in space surrounded by silent shimmery balls or not being able to feel a body. that sounds awful! hell, I’ve never even passed out or been out of body before, and I heard that that process is uncomfortable.

        sorry, but I feel really bad for this girl. it sounds like she’s got nothing whatsoever to go on.

      • julia

        yeah not to mention its happening just before a huge family visit that I was looking forward to for years, lots of people coming from the states for 2 weeks. goddamn timing of everything. why couldn’t this have started next year, when were not busy. oh yeah, it happens when theres major preps that need to be done, and what happens? they also have to look over to the sick and dying one who was looking forward to the most.i know i shouldn’t be angry, because I got no control over this/nobody could see it coming, but it seems like everything good that i had, every meaningful connection was always taken from me, never lasted. i know i sound negative, but i need to vent here because i cant scream or rant or rave or eveb get angry because of how weak ive gotten. typing this out with one hand lying down takes a long time.

      • 3nCHanted_s0uL

        Julia, reading about the things that you have experienced thus far, is so familiar to me because I am also going through something similiar. Really healthy, artistic, full of imagination and life, ambitious person who had big plans 4 life, now have an illness that effects the body and isn’t recognized by any medical personnel. Can’t move forward with life. Stuck in the same place because the body cannot do what the mind and the heart wants to do and no one can seem to help. Sound familiar?

        Due to the duality on earth, there is evil along with the good. Energy is there that can be used for good or bad. Most people use it for good things but there are some who are evil by nature, who are so consumed by jealous, anger, hate that they

      • 3nCHanted_s0uL

        Sorry my message got cut off.

        …use it for bad things, i.e. hurting people. After years of research and trial and error, I have gathered proof that this is what has happend with me,and it could be true for you as well. You can never know how someone truly feels or what they are thinking. Some peole send bad energy to you by thinking or wishing bad upon you and there are those who actually go out and find a way to make it a reality and if you do the research you will also find that what I’m talking about is 100% possible wether the general population is aware of it or not.

      • julia

        ok. I just……I;m panicking and desperate and it feels like the universe and angels and everything coming out of me is falling on deaf ears, there fore I question its truth.. I might as well just die by my own hands anyway brecause its been hell for me and everyone around me since before I was born . I never asked for any pf it tp hppen, it just got dumpred on me. I woul have protested being incarnated if I had known what disappointments lay ahead. I need instant chat. I was led tp believe that I was in control. and I believed it for a while. but over the years, experience showed me otherwise. I don’t know what to do anymore.

      • 3nCHanted_s0uL

        I know its really hard to accept your current reality when you start to look at all the shit you’ve been through since even before birth. Especially, when people around you haven’t even been through half of what you have, and they are judging you for who you are at this moment. Have you ever thought that if ANYONE else were to go thru all the shit you’ve been through that they would have killed themselves long time ago? They wouldn’t have been able to handle it, right? That’s because only you, Julia, are strong enough to do this and you are STILL here, there’s a reason for that.

        Although all the things that happened to you thus far in this life may (or may not) be due to someone else’s actions, when you look at it in a grand scheme of things, you will see that it happend because it was all meant to happen to

      • 3nCHanted_s0uL

        Idk why this site always cuts off of my msgs ugh!

        …happen in order to make you into the woman that you are meant to become. Yes, it wasn’t ‘Julia’ who asked for all this; yes, it was all dumped on ‘Julia,’ but the person who did ask for it and who did dump it was none other than you, yourself. This is the higher you that knows the lessons behind all the unfortunate events that occurred in your life, the one who knows that you are strong enough to handle all of it. Once you realize that it was you (your higher self) who did this to you (Julia), you will be able to accept it and love/thank yourself for giving you the opportunity to learn all the lessons that you have learned but don’t realize. If you are not accepting your reality, you are denying (a part of) yourself who was the one who gave it to you in the first place. I can only hope that you feel a little better after reading my words. You have come so far please dont give up yet. If you would like to contact me, I can be reached at poojakeshary@hotmail.com.

      • julia

        I thought it was something like that too at first. tried to cure it myself. it took 5 months of continuous slow decline to realize that this was out ogf everyones control. but thank you fir listening.

  • Callies’ Pet Human

    This is interesting because a few years ago I saw a TV show about children who remembered other lives. One young boy recalled being one of the people who jumped from the World Trade Center on 9/11. Thankfully, as he told his mother, his soul left his body before it hit the pavement. I know this topic evokes a lot of painful memories for many but perhaps we can take comfort in the idea that those who departed their bodies that day did get some help from the higher planes.

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