My father is now in the hospital in grave condition. Please excuse the fact that I didn’t edit any of the following post and that this introduction is so short. Pray for his peaceful transition. 

Me: Let’s see if we can get Bob Hope in here. He was such a funny guy. Want to?

Jamie: Oh, I hope we get the young—Oh, he’s gone. I guess that’s a yes. I hope we get young Bob Hope.

Me: Oh, yeah.

Jamie: Did he do, um, oh hi! Hi!

Me: Well that was quick.

Jamie (to Bob Hope, giggling): Did you hear me?

Bob: I don’t know how young I am, but I hope it’s good enough for you!

Me: Oh my god, he’s been eavesdropping!

Jamie: He probably knew he was coming.

Me: Oh yeah. Hello Mr. Hope.

Bob: Good morning, ladies.

Me: We were talking about hope in the earlier segment, so that reminded me of how much hope you gave to so many soldiers.

Bob: Hope definitely comes with a lot of laughter.

Me: Exactly. I bet you chose that name for that purpose.

Bob: It does have a lot to do with it.

Me: I guess you know why we’re here.

Jamie: What? I don’t know what he’s saying!

Bob: Why I ought.

Me: Yeah, that’s what they said in his day. Okay, the first question I’d like to ask you is what do you think your spiritual mission was during your life as Bob Hope?

Jamie: He kind of puckers out his lips. I forgot how cute he was.

Bob: Yeah, like all my cartoon characters.

Jamie and I giggle.

Jamie: Okay, he’s going to be funny.

Bob: It’s a good thing you told me throughout my life, because I don’t know what I would have said if I had to break my life down into parts. My spiritual lesson, personally—I’m just looking at my life.

Me: No, you’re spiritual mission.

Jamie: Oh, he’s jabbing you with the fact that mission and purpose are different.

Me: Oh okay. That’s fine. Roll with it, then.

Bob: For me it had to be—

Jamie (to Bob): Well, say it however way you want.

(Pause)

Jamie (to Erik): Erik, quit.

Me: What’s Erik doing now?

Jamie: They’re laughing—laughing and talking about how he should word this and they go off on a funny tangent. Like just then they talk about golf; they talk about being on stage for the army. I don’t what that’s called.  Performed for them while they’re abroad or something.

Bob: Honesty.

Jamie (to Bob): See? That’s all you had to do.

(Pause)

Jamie (to Bob and Erik): Oh you guys! I’m going to have to separate you. That’s it. Erik, go in the other room for this one. (pause) No, just go. You can hang out with him al you want later. (pause) Please?

I laugh.

Erik: I promise I’ll be good.

Jamie: I don’t care. Just go sit on the couch.

Erik reluctantly slinks over to the couch and sits.

Jamie (surprised): Ha ha! I win! I win! Oh my god, I won!

Me: Wow, he actually obeyed!

Jamie: He did. Face to face with Bob who is not so tall.

Me: Oh, really? What does he look like? What age is he?

Jamie: I looked at him and he goes, “forty-two.”

Me: Okay.

Jamie (laughing): Okay!

Jamie (to Bob): Did you really? You lived to be 100?

Me: Whoa! That’s awesome! Good for you, Bob!

Jamie: Congratulations!

Bob: I had to see the millennium. I wanted to make sure spaceships weren’t coming.

Jamie: Okay, he’s here and focused. Now, let’s ask him questions.

Me: All right. Spiritual mission.

Bob: Honesty.

Me: Okay, were you here to learn anything?

Bob: Honesty.

Me: Well that made it easy. Honestly?

Bob: Honestly.

Me: Okay. Were you here to teach anything? This is going to be a very short interview!

Bob: Laughter.

Me: Okay, and why were you here to teach laughter? Tell me about the value of laughter.

Meanwhile, Jamie has been laughing hard since we’ve ben asking these questions.

Jamie: He’s been answering these with such a sincere face, like if he goes wrong he’s going to be catapulted into the air or something. It’s the look on his face that makes you want to giggle.

Me: I know exactly what you mean.

Bob: If you were in school with me, you would have been in so much trouble, but I never got in trouble, because I knew how to turn on a dime and straighten up and play the role. The ones who suffered were the ones I encouraged to follow me into laughter who could not snap out of it.

Me: Oh, I could see that in his comedy routines. You were too young to remember that Jamie.

Bob: I was born with it. I was born with the gift of laughter. It was not that I saw the weakness in everything to turn into a smile—the weakness of economy and family life and relationships—it was more of why are we going to let the heavier set feelings (and he shows me image of a heavier set person) weigh us down? We can go through all of our choices in life while we laugh. That was my goal. It made me feel good; if it made me feel good then I was going to do it. From an early age I worked on it, and –

(Long pause)

Jamie (to Bob): What? Fighting? (to me) He fought. (to Bob) In a war? Were you in the war? He fought in a ring.

Me: Oh, boxing.

Jamie (to Bob): You didn’t box! (pause) You did? (pause) There’s no way!

Me: Did that have some sort of purpose in your spiritual mission?

Bob: Yes.

Me: Can you expand on that?

Bob (Pointing to Jamie): The little lady got lost.

Jamie (giggling): Well, I just wanted to make sure that’s what you meant. Sorry.

Bob: When I was boxing, I discovered really how people can channel anger and make it work against or for them.  I found that anger makes for a really weak person. They end up a lot of loopholes that you can jump through without being touched. You think about that one. I mean a lot more than what I just said.

Me: It’d be a lot easier if you just came out and said it but okay.

Bob: Now I wasn’t a very good boxer. It was when I was a kid. I was young. But it made me realize who I wanted to be and how I didn’t want to use the anger and aggression that I came across. It really propelled me to be funny.

Me: Can you explain that connection better?

Bob: Would you rather be punched in the face or have a good laugh?

Me: Oh, I think I’d rather have a good laugh.

Bob: Me too.

Me: Okay. I got it. Do you think you accomplished all that you cam e here to do?

Bob: I would like to think so! They kept me alive long enough!

Me: I was going to say! You had 100 years to do it!

We all get a good laugh out of that.

Jamie: He’s really proud of living that long.

Me: Yeah.

Bob: And yes, I was most grateful for the 30 years I was extremely old because it made me go into childhood again. There were a lot of thing that I couldn’t do, you know, that I couldn’t do when I was young. So, it took another turn and it let me look at life in a different way.

Me: Are you talking about your second childhood?

Bob: Yes. There’s a reason they call it that. You can’t drive a car anymore. You go back to using crayons.

Jamie (giggling): He says, “You don’t write that well?” He’s saying so many silly things!

Me: I don’t write that well now! Okay, did you gain any insights when you crossed over?

Jamie: The big bing? The big bing? The big bang? Thad’s what he calls his death.

(Pause)

Jamie (to Bob): Okay, now start over and tell me again. You can’t talk that quickly.

Bob: After my death, I realized truly how lucky I was. When I met a person, I met a person. I didn’t meet a president. I didn’t meet a famous actor or actress. I met a person. I pride myself on that. What the person represented or what status they were in or how much control they had didn’t change how I was about to interact with them, and it allowed me to get to know people just for who they were. So, upon my death I realized I did this. It may not be a huge accomplishment other people are striving for or what they think I should have focused on but it was important enough for me. And in my death I realized that so much of how we choose to see the world when we’re alive is taught to us by someone else. We’re really not given that chance to say, “I don’t like the way you’re teaching me; I don’t like the way it looks; I’m going to change it.” And in my old age, it gave me time to change. Through my death, it gave me a bigger voice that this is what we need to be teaching.

Me: Yes. You sure were your own man, Mr. Hope. You did what you wanted to do, and you saw people the way you wanted to see them: for who and what they really were.

Bob: Yes, yes. Thank you.

Me: Now, can you share a life that most influenced your life as Bob Hope?

Jamie laughs.

Me: Is he giving you that deer in the headlights look again, Jamie?

Jamie: No, he says, “Well, that has to be a life where I came back as Bing Crosby.”

Me: For real?

Jamie: No, he’s teasing.

Me: Yeah, because they were contemporaries. I’m teasing too!

Jamie: He was laughing under his breath with his mouth closed, and that’s what got me giggling.

Bob: Yes we were contemporaries but that was the life that most influenced my life at them time.

Jamie: Oh, so that’s why that was funny.

Bob (to Jamie): You’re slow.

Jamie: Oh yes. Thank you. Erik is talking from the couch explaining what he considers to be a past life.

Me: Okay.

Jamie: Oh, he’s talking about a life in Russia. He was a man, a dancer. HE did ballet and tap. He loved the tap but wasn’t a fan of the ballet, but he was better at the ballet than he was at the tap.

Bob: It was such a pity. I didn’t live to and old age. I was about 27 with I passed, but I danced my little heart out. I had time to marry; I had time to have kids, but I was sent away from by family because I showed such talent. It was more for royal entertainment. Unfortunately, everything I did was under a watchful eye. I was very comfortable being watched, but I wasn’t’ very comfortable having my choices made for me. So, I knew I wanted to be in the limelight, but I also knew that I wanted it under my own terms it my way. I got it. I didn’t just get 27 years of it or 25 years of it. I got it times four.

Jamie: Oh, he is so proud.

Me: Aw! Now, do you have any messages for us, for humanity?

Jamie breaks out in laughter.

Me: On no. What’s going on?

Jamie: He dropped down. He put one elbow on the wooden countertop and rested his chin on his hand, you know, and kind of settles his fingers over his mouth like, um—

Me: Like the statue of The Thinker?

Jamie: Yeah, yeah yeah, yeah, yeah! Just like the statue of The Thinker! He goes, “Oh, to have so much power.”

I chuckle in response.

Jamie: Aw, he’s giggling. (pause) He stood up. He has both of his hands down on the counter.

Bob: I would like it to be on paper that the eyes lie.

Jamie: Oh, oh. There’s two ways that he’s showing it. First it’s written eyes. E-Y-E-S. The eyes lie. The beneath it, um, oh gosh, then he has the letter I in quotation marks plural. The “I’s” I am this; I want that. I, I, I.

Bob: The ego, and the ego is triggered because it doesn’t want to fail against what others are hoping to receive or to get or whatever. The I’s lie and the heart never does.

Me: Ah! Because the ego is often built by others.

Bob: Yes.

Me: And is also built by fear.

Bob: Yes.

Me: Okay. Interesting. All right. Erik, do you have any questions for Mr. Hope before you’re banished from the couch?

Erik: Yeah. Why did you live so long?

Bob: Because I had the best remedy on Earth: laughter.

Me: That’s right. And you have to keep spreading it around, huh?

Bob: It heals everything and dammit wouldn’t you know I kept healing!

Me: You kept healing yourself!

Jamie: He keeps doing these, “I’m so old, dat, da, dat, da, dat…” like these little one liner jokes.

Me (giggling): I know exactly what you mean. Oh, I forgot to ask you a question. Are you reincarnated now?

Bob: No, no. No thank you.

Me: Well, I don’t blame you.

Bob: There’s too much going on.

Me: God, tell me about it. Well, thank you, Mr. Hope. It’s been an honor having you here.

Jamie: He’s saying thank you but the way he’s blowing his kisses, it’s not the traditional way.  Um, I don’t know how to explain it. It’s like he crumples his hand up like a soft fist and kisses his thumb and then extends his hand out like he’s throwing it at you. He’s waving goodbye saying thank you.

Me: Thank you, Mr. Hope. Bye.

Jamie (waving dismissively to Erik): Go, Erik.

(Pause)

Jamie (to Bob): Just please, anytime. Yes. (to me) Bob says he’d like to come back and I said anytime. He’s doing a little foot routine. I guess it’s tap. I don’t know.

Me: I can’t imagine it in my head.

Jamie: Erik’s poking fun, and still he’s doing these one liner jokes.

Me: He was so funny.