A lot of us who have lost a loved one are afraid that they won’t get that warm, fuzzy feeling from them. We need to be slathered with love to replace what we miss, physically, but do spirits love ’em or leave ’em?

Me: Erik, does the love spirits feel for those they leave behind change or diminish over the passage of time?

Jamie (laughing): Oh, he’s just totally interrupting!

Erik: Change? Yes. Diminish? No.

Me: How does it change?

Erik: Oh, it’s crazy. It’s like this weird comfort. Normally, I could look out and see shit I didn’t like. You know, “Oh, why did they do that?” “Oh, they’re hurting that person. Now I don’t like that.” I would have a judgment on it that helped feed my personality, what my needs were and how I wanted to see myself.

Me: Mm hmm.

Erik: But I don’t have that anymore. So it really changes how you perceive your loved one on Earth. They could live their lives in a way that you’d think of it as a fuck up if you’re a human being, but now, as a spiritual being, it doesn’t even register as a fuck up. It just registers as this beautiful act that your loved one just did.

Me: All right. Interesting. Does the physical separation change our feelings?

Erik: Yeah, that gets a little weird to get used to. That takes a while. It took awhile for me. There are some people who cross over and they just get it right away. It’s totally fine. They’re okay with it.

Me: Well, what did you go through?

Erik: I missed, you know, being hugged. I missed that touch. That wasn’t something I was prepared to go on without.

Me (solemnly): Yeah.

He’s not the only one.

Erik: I was ready to go on with out the pain and suffering in my head, the voices in my head. I was ready to surrender quite a bit, and it was easy to do that, but then when it came to, “Oh look. I’m looking at my brother or my sisters, my family and I can’t reach out to them anymore. Rot Row!

That’s what the Jetson’s dog says instead of saying, “Uh oh.”

I laugh.

Jamie (laughing): He did that so well!

Me: He did used to do that.

Jamie: I swear; he should do voiceovers.

Me: I know! I could be another gig for him.

Jamie (to Erik): Your backup gig.

Erik: You know, it got hard, and you learn to substitute that need for a physical interaction with that new boundless love feeling that you have for the person. I mean, it’s a pretty damn good substitution because you’re getting to love that person so much more than what you were able to or allow yourself to do when you were alive.

Me: Okay.

I wish he could have both.

Me: Do the relationships and experiences on the other side take away from the ones you developed and had on Earth?

Erik: These are great questions. No, our relationships here don’t take away from any life that we’re having. In each incarnation, our relationship in this new dimension, at Home, does not interfere or collide with those stories within our other incarnations. I’d say if anything, they help us embrace our lives more. They help us withstand what we were going through or connecting with. It’s more of an enhancement than a, “What the fuck were you doing? Avoid that shit!” Sometimes we can talk crap about the choices that we’ve made like the “stupid” ones. There are times when we’ll get together and do funny shit like, “What was the stupidest way to die?” There are all sorts of crazy shit—a golf ball to the head when you were pulling weeds, and you’re not even on the golf course.

Me: I remember there was some guy who was putting his pants on, and he lost his balance, hit his head on something and died! You’re supposed to put on one leg at a time, but not for this guy.

Erik: Not that day. Life said, “Uh uh. That’s it for you.”

Jamie and I giggle.

Erik: But there’s a lot of humor here that embraces, you know, the stuff we’ve done on Earth. So, no, it definitely doesn’t collide.

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