This one will ring true to all of you who have lost a love one. Erik’s pretty raw here, but he’s right. And there are ways to raise that dense energy of grief. Just think about the joyful memories with that loved one, for example. I find it very interesting how we say things like, “I’m depressed” or “I’m feeling low” or “I’m on cloud nine.” Statements like these match our vibrational frequency on that long electromagnetic spectrum where all energy vibrates at unique points: X-rays, UV rays, microwaves, radio waves, etc. We’re in the part called the “visible range.” That’s where we see things. Spirits are at a frequency above that range. That’s why we can’t see them. But when we’re sad or grief-stricken, our vibrational frequency plummets to the lower end of that range, making it so hard for our deceased loved ones to lower their energy to reach us. We need to meet them halfway. And some spirits have more trouble lowering their energy than others. Read on.

Me: Some of the blog members have read that when people are grieving it creates a lot of negative energy for the departed and this low vibration holds the spirit close to the earthly plane, making it more difficult to enter into the higher plane—

Jamie bursts out laughing!

Jamie: Oh geez! I want to imitate him so bad! He’s moaning and groaning so loud and he said, “Jesus fucking Christ!” I don’t think you want to put that in there.

Of course I will due to my no-edit policy. Sorry guys.

Erik (chuckling): Seriously? You want to attach your grief process to the punishment of your loved one? Who the fuck are you? Get in line and let me whip your back. Does that make you feel better? Cuz please, let me know what it is. Let me beat the shit out of you so you feel better. That’s ridiculous!

I can’t help but chuckle, too.

Erik: The only truth to this is that when you’re thinking of us, no matter if it’s happiness or sadness—whatever fucking emotion—we’re picking up on it. We get it. We know exactly what you’re going through, because we are involved in it whether it’s a memory from a long, long time ago or it’s our immediate passing—you’re involving us, we’re there. We feel it. Nothing you do tethers our ass to the ground. I’m sorry, but it’s not about you! You can’t dance better to make us happier in Heaven. You can’t drink less to make us happier in Heaven. You can’t put flowers on our grave to make our crossing over quicker. What we want from you is a continued relationship. I’ll just be honest, you know, most of us, we’d love to still be a part of your life. But as soon as it’s crippling or handicapping your life because you’re trying to include us too much, we don’t fucking like that shit at all.

Me: So, it’s not how it affects you; it’s about how you know it affects us?

Erik: Right, and if you’re sad and crying and grieving, it creates, around you, a denser level of energy, and so it’s harder for us to get close to you and like talk to you and tell you if we’re happy or we’re sad or what’s going on with us. It’s because you’re too stuck in your own damn hole.

Me: Mm hm.

Erik: Right? And we find that you’ll get out of it when you want to. You dug it for a reason; so don’t beat your own ass up. When you’re done and you get out of the hole and you find joy and happiness, all of a sudden you sense and feel us around more, and don’t act surprised, because that’s how it works. When you’re happy, your vibration increases, becomes more fine-tuned. It’s easier for us to connect to—give you signs, talk to you, chill out with you. But, uh, man you are NOT responsible. Mom, I am totally sorry for cutting you off. I just couldn’t stand to listen to the rest of the question.

Me: Oh, it’s okay. That totally makes sense.

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Dear Reader,

The journey on which you’re about to embark will take you through stories that are deeply personal and involves a relationship between a mother and her son.

As a physician raised by two atheists, I had no personal belief system about life after death. In a word, I was a confirmed skeptic. As my journey progressed, my mind opened. It is my sincerest hope that yours will open as well and that you will have a greater understanding of your own life and what’s to come ahead.

Although Erik sometimes paints a rosy picture of the afterlife, time and time again he stresses that suicide is not the answer to one’s problems. If you struggle, please understand that the information in my blog and my book is no substitute for professional help. Please click here for a list of resources for help when you find yourself considering taking your own life. Know that they are readily available when you feel that hopelessness and despair that many of us feel from time to time in our lives.

I refuse all donations and ad revenue on the blog. It is my dream to one day establish a nonprofit organization that delivers a variety of spiritual services for those who have lost loved ones to suicide and cannot afford that assistance on their own. It’s a mission of love, sacrifice, and dedication.

Love and light,

Elisa