I’m still coughing up gross stuff from my lungs, so I’m going to keep this short. For once, I have NO announcement, so that must be a relief to you guys.
We all have encounters people in our lives who just suck the energy out of us. Some constantly ask for us to surrender our emotional resources to them. Others just have that energy that’s exhausting, and it’s a lot worse if you’re an empath. See what Erik has to share on the subject, but first, PLEASE HIT SUBSCRIBE and help me get to that 100K mark that’s apparently very important! Jennifer Doran did a masterful job channeling. Check her out HERE.
Here is the transcript, but PLEASE let the video role so I can collect the ad revenue. You can mute your phone or computer if you want.
Elisa: Hello, Miss Jennifer and my lovely boy, Erik. How are you doing?
Jennifer: Doing great, doing great. How are you?
Elisa: Good, good! I’m gonna do a call out to Deanna who gave me so many nice little things, bracelets, and I’ve got so many compliments when I was on my little trip to Colorado. So, thank you, Deanna.
Jennifer: She’s so sweet. She’s so, so sweet.
Elisa: Yeah, she is, and hopefully this will take the focus off my hair, which has reached a critical mass.
Elisa: (joking in funny robotic voice, Jennifer laughing) Critical mass achieved. So, I’m getting a haircut tomorrow. It’s really bad. But, we are going to talk about how to hold onto your emotional resources and protect yourself from energy vampires. Oh, god, yes. I have been one—I have been a victim of energy vampires many times. So, my sweet boy, I miss you and thank you for going on the trips with me. Really appreciate it.
Jennifer: Oh, he had a great time.
Elisa: Yeah, I know. He must have.
Erik: I had a great time. It was so fun.
Elisa: Yeah, oh, Colorado was awesome. The weather was, mm!
Jennifer: Gorgeous. Yeah, gorgeous. So, the first thing that he says about energy vampires is that they’re sneaky.
Erik: They’re sneaky. So, usually, at least the first instance with them, you don’t realize it’s happening before it’s kind of too late.
Elisa: Oh, that’s true.
Erik: That they’ve drained your energy, that they’ve zapped you, that they’ve sucked you in.
Jennifer: That’s kind of a pun there, I guess. (Elisa laughs)
Erik: The biggest problem is recognizing them to begin with, learning how to recognize it, and the best way to do it is to stay present in the moment, which is very difficult to do as humans.
Elisa: Oh, god.
Erik: Especially when you meet somebody new, when you’re dealing with somebody new. Before you answer a question of theirs, take a deep breath. How does what they said to me make me feel. Do I feel awkward? Do I feel uncomfortable? Am I getting any warning bells, but most often, we just get going. We don’t take the time to say, like, what’s really happening here and that’s the biggest issue is that—that human brain. Go, go, go, go, go, go.
Elisa: Yeah, is it—
Erik: So, slowing down—
Erik: ―being present in the moment is a good way to identify energy vampires before they have the chance to take your energy.
Elisa: I know and they don’t have to be always mean. In fact, in my experience, most energy vampires are super nice like my younger sister, Denise. I love you, Denise, but yes, you were. It’s just like it was exhausting to be around her. I guess she was always like—
Elisa: ―in my space, talking—
Elisa: Maybe not asking for things all the time but just needing attention—
Elisa: ―More than anything else, and it’s just like—
Erik: One of the biggest things, it’s not that they’re mean. It’s that they’re needy. They need, they need, whether it be reassurance, whether it be—
Elisa: Attention, yeah.
Erik: Yeah, whatever. There’s a neediness behind energy vampires.
Elisa: What makes them? Are they raised a certain way, for example?
Jennifer: Mm hm. Yeah—
Elisa: Not getting attention in their childhood, or—
Erik: Yes, of course. Sometimes they’re just energy vampires because the rest of us need to learn from ‘em, so sometimes it’s just the role that they are to play in a particular relationship. But yes, not getting enough attention as a child, not feeling heard, insecurity. Insecurity plays a role here, but not all people who are insecure are energy vampires, but it does definitely play a role. That reassurance is a big one, just like—
Erik: ―that self-esteem, like you’re okay, like everything’s all right, you’re not weird, you’re not insane. It’s sort of like—
Erik: ―worried about who they are as a person. So, they need, need, need from others.
Elisa: Well, maybe they also can be Starseeds or feel like they don’t belong here, or feel ungrounded and need reassurance because of that? I mean, could that be a type.
Erik: Oh, absolutely. That plays right into insecurity because a lot of times Starseeds feel insecure here. It’s kind of like, okay, wait a second. It’s like, if you took, for the most part, anybody and picked them up and dropped them down into an area they don’t know anything about, they don’t know the people, people are gonna kinda feel like, “Okay, wait a second,” and you’re gonna need help from others. With energy vampires, that neediness can become habitual.
Jennifer: So, but maybe if—
Elisa: Yeah because maybe they get addicted to it, like, “Oh, that felt good—
Elisa: ―she reassured me, so I want more,” that sort of thing.
Jennifer: Yes, yes, yes, so addictive and habitual, like if maybe they worked on self-esteem, they’re still kind of energy vampires, it’s because this is just always how they’ve behaved.
Elisa: Yeah, and then maybe depend on others to supply their self-esteem for them instead of finding self-love inside and rediscovering and reclaiming the power that they always had basically inside.
Jennifer: Yeah, yeah. Absolutely.
Erik: There are energy vampires who have a much more negative effect on us. Sometimes, like what we’ve been talking about before, like, kind of more of that neediness, it can be like, “Yes, I’ve told you for the hundredth time that this is okay.” You know, like that—
Elisa: Yeah, yeah.
Erik: Where it doesn’t really bring us down into like a really low vibration—
Jennifer: But it can be a drain on us.
Erik: There’s other energy vampires that can really lower our vibration, really, really bring us down, like, bring negativity into our environment.
Elisa: Yeah. The other ones are, like, ugh, I don’t have time for this, this kind of thing, but I’ve got all these kids—
Elisa: ―but this other type, they bring you down. Can you give us an example, Erik?
Erik: Yeah, so this would be, well, like, the people who are more on the attack. You have experienced this personally here over the last few months, some of the more negative—
Elisa: Oh, yeah, yeah.
Erik: ―energy vampires. So, it’s that they still need attention. There’s still a neediness to it,
Elisa: Mm hm.
Erik: Like the trolls on the Internet. These are energy vampires because what they’re doing is they’re putting out negativity to stir something up because they need that negative response back. They get something out of it.
Erik: So, Internet trolls, that’s a real good one right now because everybody’s probably has some sort of experience with an energy troll. That is an example of a pretty negative energy vampire. And because then what happens is when you defend yourself against them, it doesn’t matter what you say. It does not matter. When you’re dealing with somebody like this, it doesn’t matter if you have all the facts in the world behind you. Nothing you say is gonna—so, it’s like a negative exchange of energy.
Elisa: Yes, like fighting fire with fire.
Erik: Yes, but see, for the person who’s being attacked by the energy vampire, they’re losing. They’re losing their energy. They’re losing their positive outlook. They’re losing their confidence, and the other person is getting like a rush from it, like a high from it.
Elisa: Ah. The dopamine.
Jennifer: Mm hm.
Elisa: They’re being rewarded, yeah. So, what do you, how do you handle these trolls and other negative—the ones who want to bring your vibration down. How do you handle it besides just, like, don’t read the comments or ignore—
Elisa: ―but even if you do that, ignoring, it still is like a little pang of pain in your heart.
Jennifer: So, oh, absolutely, so, he’s, he’s funny.
Erik: It’s so hard for people to do what—really one of the best things to do is to send love—
Erik: ―and positive energy to them. If you’re somebody who prays, you pray for them. It’s like you have to try to see them—
Elisa: As flawed, as hurting, I think.
Jennifer: As—y-y-yes yes. Somebody that’s flawed, somebody that’s hurting, somebody that’s damaged.
Elisa: Damaged, aw.
Jennifer: But it’s so easy to get into that kind of defensive, defensive state.
Elisa: I know. I’ve been I caught up in that. I totally know—
Jennifer: It’s, it’s—
Elisa: It’s very difficult.
Jennifer: As a human, it’s almost impossible at least not sometimes to get caught up in it.
Erik: Because, again, we’re not here to be perfect. So, it’s okay to do it, but then you learn from it and say, “Okay, well this didn’t work last time, so maybe I’ll try something else this time.”
Elisa: Yeah, because you just feed it. If you fight back, you just feed into their power, and that means giving away your power. I mean, you always have to stay at a point where, I mean, after all they may come from a place of power—artificial power—
Elisa: ―but they are damaged, and their vibration is lower, and I guess you just have to remember that and rise above and try to raise their vibration by sending them, love, light, praying for them, etc.
Jennifer: Yes, yes, absolutely.
Erik: In this world, like with the spirituality and the psychic and the mediumship and stuff, kind of like if you’re somebody—and if you’re empathic, any of this sort of thing, you’re gonna experience energy vampires quite a bit.
Erik: In just your everyday life , in your work environment, in your home environment, online. You’re gonna experience—experience them. You just basically kind of learn the feelings that you get in your body—
Erik: ―and it will help you to avoid, it will help you to avoid them. Some people just want so much from you. Like, at work, in a work setting. Like if you work in an office and one of your coworkers is constantly asking you for help with their work.
Erik: It’s like this is another form of, like, an energy vampire that may be a little bit more subtle because this person may seem kind of friendly. Boundaries. You have to have boundaries. Like, if you took a person who one person would consider an energy vampire, somebody else might not.
Elisa: That’s true.
Erik: Either their defenses were good, or whatever it was that was draining the other person just doesn’t matter to the second. It’s like, “Okay, whatever. This this behavior doesn’t bother me. It doesn’t—
Elisa: Yeah, yeah.
Erik: Some people do really well, like, without addicts. Some people can work with people with addiction, and it doesn’t drain on them, whereas other people, it’s like, one experience is, like, an exhausting thing.
Elisa: Yeah, and it’s really easy, because they can be manipulative, it’s very easy to enable them, like the coworker doing the work that he or she should be able to learn how to do themselves, etc.
Jennifer: Yes. Yeah, he’s—
Elisa: Or the addict, yeah.
Jennifer: ―he just, Erik just made a joke. It would be, it’s like The Scarlet Letter. If they could just wear a big “V,” a big red “V” (Elisa laughing), so we would all know who the energy vampires are to us.
Elisa: Exactly. So, how do you set the boundaries? Give me an example. Well, what we could, let’s bring—can we bring in my sister Denise, one of the nice energy vampires? Do you think you could find Aunt Denise?
Erik: Yeah. Oh, absolutely.
Elisa: Okay, Erik, go hunt her down.
Elisa: I haven’t talked to her for so long.
Jennifer: Ooh. Sorry, I get a little head pain as her energy comes in.
Elisa: Oh, really? She’s—
Jennifer: It’s okay. It’s how I work. I just get a little—
Elisa: She could be a headache, haha!
Jennifer: (laughs). Okay, so what was the question?
Elisa: Well, I was wondering, Denise, if you’re there, hello. I haven’t talked to you for so long.
Elisa: Miss you.
Denise: Hi. Hi. Yes, yes, I miss you too. Love you.
Elisa: Are you happy?
Denise: Of course, of course.
Elisa: And as you know, we took care of—my husband and I—I mean, Papa and I took care of you for a long time because you were really struggling with so many disabilities.
Elisa: And sometimes it would be very hard for me because you were always there, always in my face, always asking questions—
Jennifer: Very needy. She said I was, I—
Elisa: ―and very nice, though, but why were you like that? You had to [unintelligible] with my parents, but—
Denise: Yes, yes.
Elisa: How should I have handled it?
Jennifer: So, what she’s saying is that there—so number 1, she was emotionally very needy, but she was also physically very needy.
Elisa: Yes, oh yeah.
Jennifer: And so she became a victim.
Denise: I went right into that victim role.
Jennifer: What she said to me is that, by the time you started taking care of her, the victim personality was too ingrained. There was no way to change it.
Jennifer: So, what she says is had you tried to set boundaries or had you tried—it just wouldn’t have worked because she would’ve become more needy, or she would’ve had more—I don’t know—outbursts or panic or, so it just, it was the way it needed to be, but what would have been e beneficial is if we could’ve caught that sort of victim—
Elisa: Earlier, yeah.
Jennifer: That victim—because yes, while physically she may have needed help, emotionally she could have—
Denise: Emotionally I could have been less of a victim had I worked on it.
Elisa: Well, yeah, yeah. Well, I mean, I think the way you were raised. I mean, my parents were pretty much emotionally neglectful and abusive. So, was that why?
Jennifer: Yes. What she just said to me is that somewhere in her younger days, she almost had, like, just an absolute emotional disconnect.
Jennifer: It’s like she almost is telling me she had to go into, like, a safe place. She had to, like, create a safe place.
Elisa: Yeah, me too, yeah.
Jennifer: So, it’s like she was living in a fantasy, in a fantasy kind of world.
Jennifer: So, for her, it’s almost as if in the situation here, that energy vampire thing—
Elisa: Mm hm.
Jennifer: ―is kind of like in the, in the chart , in the, in the journey—
Elisa: Oh, yeah.
Jennifer: ―for everybody to learn from, and she kinda smiles.
Denise: See, we wouldn’t be talking about this right now if I hadn’t—
Elisa: That’s true!
Denise: ―if I hadn’t brought that lesson here.
Elisa: That’s true!
Jennifer: So, for her it was kind of ingrained in there.
Elisa: Well, what were—what are most of the energy vampires that are like you, nice, what are they—if it’s in their chart—what are they here to learn, and what are they here to teach?
Denise: Some of the things to teach are about—for others to learn to, like, keep your strength, to find your power, to keep your power—
Denise: ―and if you think you’ve lost it, to find it again. Of course, there’s always something for them to learn about finding that themselves and kind of moving beyond this, and how do I get out of this? In any pattern of behavior that any of us come here with, we can learn better ways to cope with it, learn coping skills, how to get out of this. Even if it’s a behavior you can’t entirely get rid of, maybe it’s a behavior you can learn to cope with better. There’s that for us to learn—
Denise: ―about, but anybody who has any kind of repeating behavior.
Denise: Compassion is another one that people who are energy vampires but very nice and sweet like this, for others there’s a lesson about compassion.
Elisa: Oh, yeah, and patience, I’m sure.
Jennifer: Yes, patience is a huge one, because she said at points you knew that she couldn’t help herself.
Denise: I got to the point where I could not help myself anymore.
Elisa: No, no. I know.
Jennifer: And so, what else can you do but help her?
Elisa: No, she really needed help physically. I had to come home from the clinic at regular intervals to straight cath her bladder because she was very sick.
Denise: Very happy to leave here.
Elisa: Oh, god, yeah.
Denise: Very happy to go.
Elisa: Yeah, sure. You had a lot of misery at the end. All right, so any advice, Denise, that you can give anybody that has an energy vampire in their life, or that are energy vampires in this life?
Jennifer: Okay, so what she’s specifically directing me to is that there are certain people—and it’s like you’re gonna know this when you hear it—who attract a lot of energy vampires, okay?
Elisa: Oh, yeah.
Denise: So, most of us, we’re gonna have one or two in our life, and we just have to assume that’s a lesson that we’re supposed to learn, and we moved from it. But if you are somebody who is always attracting energy vampires into your life, you probably really need to take a look at your boundaries.
Denise: [unintelligible] the tolerance for certain behaviors. Do you give too much of yourself in relationships, friendships? Are you giving too much of yourself in the beginning so that you’re not getting an even exchange? These are things to pay attention to, but it’s very hard to go from being somebody with maybe some lax boundaries—
Denise: ―to try to enforce boundaries. People who are around you are not going to like it if you’re somebody with not many boundaries, and you try to enforce boundaries.
Elisa: Yeah, that’s true. I’ve seen that. I have seen that.
Jennifer: Oh, yes. [unintelligible]
Elisa: ―Saying no is very difficult. I always want to help people, but then I get overwhelmed because they just, “Oh, you want to help? All right, let me give you all this huge stack of problems to fix.
Elisa: And then when you, then all of a sudden, they get mad at you if—
Jennifer: Yes, yes.
Denise: If you say no from the beginning, it’s easier. It’s like you start disciplining children from the beginning instead of trying to discipline them when they become teenagers.
Elisa: When they’re brats! Really, that’s true, that’s true.
Denise: So, you’ve got to set your boundaries and don’t give them too much of yourself. It’s about balance. Make sure that [unintelligible]
Elisa: Yeah, and I’m sure that that can cause illness in some people, if they’re drained.
Jennifer: Oh, yes.
Elisa: Yeah, what kind of illnesses can you get if your emotions, your resources are drained all the time?
Denise: Oh, geez, anxiety, depression, stomach issues. There’s a wide range. Weight loss, weight gain.
Elisa: Like cancer, arthritis? Any of those things? [unintelligible]
Denise: Yes, eventually to lead to this. Anything like this, anything where you’re depleting all the time, it’s going to go to whatever area of your body is weak.
Denise: The physical weaknesses in your body. We all have physical weaknesses.
Denise: So, these kind of behaviors, this kind of stress that we put ourselves under tends to attach those areas of our body that are weaker. So, yeah, if you’re somebody who has, like, a weakness or DNA that’s maybe more prone to cancer, absolutely.
Elisa: Yeah. Mm.
Denise: You may spark something like that in yourself. It’s also, depleting yourself like this, if you’re an addict can throw you right off the wagon—
Denise: ―so to speak if you—dysfunctional behaviors, it can do all of that to us. And if you are an energy vampire, well, there’s a good chance you’re not aware of it.
Elisa: Yeah, I know, probably not.
Jennifer: It’s kinda like, yeah.
Denise: A lot of times energy vampires, they get going, and there is some anxiety behind it.
Denise: And so they can’t sometimes stop themselves.
Denise: It becomes obsessive, like they need that reassurance, they need that fix, so to speak.
Elisa: Yeah. Well, can’t, can’t, would anything like hypnotic regression to another life, or going to the Akashic records to try to see if this can cut the spiritual DNA thread or—I mean, I’m just saying all—
Elisa: –quantum sessions or going to the in-between lives in the planning phase for this incarnation to figure out why, if this was a plan and if so, why. I mean, what would help?
Jennifer: Absolutely. All of that is beneficial. Of course, the person to be in the mind state of willing to explore and find answers, but yes, all of that could be helpful. A hypnosis session might work great for one person—
Jennifer: ―and a Reiki session works great for somebody else, but all of this could be helpful. But the biggest thing is the willingness to look at what’s—
Elisa: Yeah, and it’s just like borderline personality people, they rarely accept their diagnosis—
Elisa: ―so it’s really hard to get them to the place where they receive treatment. So, but, yeah—
Jennifer: Erik has now stepped kind of back forward.
Erik: If you’re finding yourself in a situation where you have to be with an energy vampire, because that quite simply is going to happen, like there are just, there are some people you just have to deal with. But things like saging and cleansing your area, stones.
Elisa: Oh, yeah.
Erik: ―therapy, all of these things can help protect you from other people’s energy.
Elisa: Smoke ‘em out! I say just smoke ‘em out!
Erik: Yes. Yeah, it’s like, envision yourself before you leave the house in the morning surrounded by whatever, the white light of the Holy Spirit if that resonates with you, or an imaginary bubble that other people’s energy can’t penetrate. There’s all kinds of ways to—the higher you keep your vibration, basically, it’s the same thing.
Elisa: Yeah, I mean, it’s like what about a garlic necklace, would that work?
Erik: Yeah, and maybe some holy water.
Elisa: There ya go—splash. “Ah, it burns, it burns!”
Jennifer: Yes, yes.
Elisa: My lovely wickedness.
Erik: The higher you keep your vibration, the less effect energy vampires will have on you.
Elisa: That’s good. I can imagine. Yeah, it affected, it impacted me most when my vibration was lower, when I had a bad day at the clinic, whatever, I don’t know.
Elisa: So, what is the most common other life link for an energy vampire. I mean, can you name, like, did Denise have a past life that made her come in as an energy vampire?
Jennifer: Oh, gosh, yeah. I gotcha, I gotcha.
Erik: It’s not necessarily like anything specific, but maybe if you were subject to an energy vampire in one life you might to come in as an energy vampire—
Elisa: Oh, yeah.
Erik: ―and see what it’s like from the other side, or absolutely, if you are energy vampire come in and see what it’s like to have to deal with one. It’s really about the range of experiences.
Erik: This isn’t like one of the huge ones. I mean, it’s a big lesson—
Erik: ―but it’s not loss and death and addiction. These are kind of, like—
Elisa: These are more rooted in other lives. Is that what he said?
Elisa: Okay, all right.
Erik: Yeah, this one’s not necessarily. It’s just like an experience that we can have here.
Elisa: Okay, what about—I think it’s gonna be the last question for this—what about the negative energy vampires like trolls? What are they here to learn or teach?
Erik: Well, one of the shittiest things for us as humans is to come in and have negative experience.
Erik: And energy vampires help give those.
Elisa: Oh, yeah.
Erik: The negative ones.
Elisa: (joking) So, it’s a gift! Maybe it’s to teach—
Jennifer: (laughing) Isn’t it beautiful?
Elisa: ―emotional resilience. A way to teach—
Jennifer: Yes. Emotional resilience—
Elisa: Yeah, self-love.
Jennifer: [unintelligible] Turning, just turning away, and yeah, self-love. He said, when we said “gift,” he said, “Yeah, like a flaming bag of dog crap on your (laughing) on your best chair.”
Elisa: I know, really.
Jennifer: Yeah, there’s a lot to learn, there’s a lot to learn, but yes, resilience, turning the other cheek. It’s just—
Elisa: Compassion for the other—
Elisa: ―for that person, because it cannot be fun to carry around all that hate all the time. I mean, it’s got to lower their vibration—
Erik: It’s absolutely not.
Elisa: It can’t feel good.
Erik: It’s absolutely not fun for them to do it, but what happens is when you live in a negative place, you become accustomed to that, so even for these people who are very negative, they may feel like they’re happy. They may feel like there’s a point to what they’re doing—
Erik: ―and that they’re here to—you can learn to function and feel comfortable if you always remain on a lower vibration.
Erik: Okay? So, it’s about your frame of reference.
Elisa: They don’t know what they’re missin’!
Erik: Correct. That’s absolutely correct. It’s like if you have 5 million dollars and this is how you’ve always lived your life with millions and millions of dollars, and all of a sudden you have no money, that’s a drastic difference.
Erik: But if you’ve always lived with no money, you don’t know anything—
Elisa: You’re okay.
Erik: People who live in that more negative space don’t even realize that they could be so much happier—
Erik: ―if they could get rid of that toxic behavior.
Elisa: So, what do they come in here to learn?
Erik: One of the one of the big ones in a situation like that is to overcome, overcome the negativity. Find love. Love would be a big—
Erik: Because oftentimes when you’re very negative like that, your heart is closed, your love.
Erik: The ability to give and receive love at a great extent is closed, so that’s a big one that they’re here to learn.
Elisa: So, do they have problems with self-love? I mean, or could they be full of self-love but still be that way?
Erik: Well, it’s kinda tough because anybody who knows a narcissist, you look at that person and think that they’re full of themselves, that they love themselves so much—
Elisa: But they don’t.
Erik: That’s how it appears but they do not.
Erik: So it may appear. No, there would be—number 1, they’re not empathic. People who live in that negative space all the time—
Erik: ―they’re not even coming in with empathy—
Erik: Which we need. We do need that for balance, but yes, even if they appear that they really love themselves and that they’re full of themselves, it’s probably a front.
Elisa: Yeah, oh. That’s too bad. Sometimes, when I get mad at people, I just try to think of them as a tiny little innocent baby—of course, they were—or a very old woman or man that’s feeble, and it just helps bring out the compassion a little bit. Anything else you want to add, Erik, before we close, and then we’re gonna do another session, if we have time, on living in ego.
Erik: You picturing them as a baby or picturing them is old, that’s actually really, really great. So, yeah, for people who are dealing with this negativity, focus on that kind of stuff. Focus on how sad their life must be and how lacking their life must be. If you can change, like, your anger towards them to kind of pity or sadness.
Elisa: Mm hm, yeah.
Erik: That’s more effective for you. For us as the non-negative people, it’s more effective for us instead of keeping the anger and the negativity. So find, yeah, find a way to shift it.
Elisa: Okay. So, in other words, me stop saying, “You kiss your mother with that mouth?” No, I haven’t , I haven’t done that for a long time. I gave up. But anyway, all right, thank you so much, Erik, I love you. Jennifer, I love you.
Erik: I love you too.
Elisa: I can’t wait ‘til you come over.
Jennifer: I know, I’m so excited.
Elisa: You guys, check her out at psychicmediumjenniferdoran.com, and I will put it here,
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