Don’t forget to sign up for the online channeling tomorrow. Jamie will trance channel Erik so you can ask him questions. I signed up and look forward to participating with you guys! Anyone who has attended these trance channeling events can attest to the fact that they’re very funny as well as insightful. Sign up HERE

Me: We talked about emotional honesty recently, and you said if the Nazis were banging down your door and asked if you were harboring Jews, um (pause) Damn, I can’t remember the scenario. Whatever. You said that you could say things in a way that wouldn’t be overtly dishonest…

Erik: You’re battling between being logically honest and emotionally honest. That’s what you’re doing.

Me: Well, what if the Nazis asked you more specifically if you’re harboring Jews in your house, and they are in your house?

Erik: If they have a strong belief, and they probably do, the harboring Jews—the house? Well, the “house” can be substituted with the kingdom’s house, and no, you’re not hiding Jews in your house.

Me (jokingly): The house of cards, whatever.

And when I thought I couldn’t be more nerdy…

Erik: There are many ways to take the human word and change its meaning to fit your needs.

Me: Or you can just say, “Jews in da house!” like at a rap meet. That’d be a terrible thing to say, though.

Erik cracks up.

Erik: I just don’t want people to get confused with the whole concept of logical lies and emotional lies.

Me: Oh! Okay. Tell me more.

Erik: Well—

(Pause)

Jamie: I asked him a question. I asked, ‘When is it good to logically lie?’

Me: I know!

Erik: Really, never, but there are times when it’s good timing to withhold information.

Me: Well, what is a logical lie?

Erik: “Did you receive the money? Yes or no?” And you did receive the money, but you don’t want them to know, because you don’t know what you’re going to do with it or whatever. It doesn’t concern them.

Me: Okay.

Erik: They’re just creating conversation for you, and so you say, “no.”

(Pause)

Erik: But you did receive the money, so that’s a logical lie. Is it emotionally impacting anyone? Fuck no, because they don’t have any rights to the money. It’s not tied to them; they’re not going to do anything with it. They’re just striking up a conversation, like, “Did you break up with Sue? Yes or no?”

Me: Okay.

Erik: Let’s say you did, but you don’t wanna fucking talk to them about it, and it has no bearing on them on who they are and how they should treat you. So you say, “no,” or if you’re a bigger man, you can just say that you don’t wanna talk about it, and you don’t wanna share it with them.

Sounds a bit sketchy to me. Hmm.

Erik: But, there are things in life, small talk, chat and shit like that, that doesn’t have an emotional bearing or tie. That conversation—

Jamie bursts out laughing at something Erik says.

Erik: That can fucking drive me batty. I hate that shit. Small talk. “How’s the weather?” (He says this in a voice that sounds like Baby Huey.)

Jamie and I laugh.

Jamie: He’s making all these goofy voices.

Me: Small talk? That’s what you do in elevators. “How ‘bout them Jets?”

Erik: Elevator talk. Like that shit doesn’t impact like, argh I can just hear people getting fucking mad. Of course your intent, your smile, that impacts people, because it sets off an emotional reaction, but if it’s just really small talk bullshit, you know, kinda fuck that. So, you can tell them you don’t wanna talk about it or just say, “no,” because that’s your boundary, that’s what you need to be sticking with, and that’s how you’re protecting yourself.

Me: Okay.

Erik: So, that’s a logical lie. If it’s an emotional lie, I’ll beat the shit out of you.

Jamie and I laugh at his idle threat. Smartass.

Jamie (to Erik): Oh, in teaching? (To me) He’s going to beat the shit out of you that this is not what you need to be doing. This isn’t the way—

Me: Who’s “you” that you’re going to beat the shit out of? (Chuckling) Are you talking to me?

Erik: Anyone who thinks they should use a topic that’s emotionally charged and just full on not be honest about it. That’s when you’re digging holes. That’s when you’re fucking yourself, and it doesn’t feel good!

Jamie laughs. I can just get the visual he sent her. Poor woman.

I laugh, too.

Jamie (wiping her tears away): Oh, Erik.

Me: He might not have meant that in a sexual way, you know!

Jamie (giggling): Whatever!

Me: Where are you coming from this morning?

Jamie (still laughing): I’m the one in the nasty.

Me: I guess so!

Either he gave her a visual, or Erik has really had a bad influence on her. Probably both!

Jamie: Oh, my goodness.

Me: Okay. I understand it. You can maybe give me one quick example of an emotional lie. What is it, like, “Do I look fat in this dress?”

Erik: Yes. If a person is asking you this, they’re someone who either needs attention and they’re milking it or asking for a compliment, or this is someone who really depends on you—the way that you perceive them, and they trust you, and it’s a very open emotional relationship.

Just for the record, I would never ask a dangerous question like that.

Erik: So, when they ask you, you tell them straight up. “In my opinion,” Cuz that’s what it is, and your opinion is not gold; I don’t care who you are. I don’t care if you’re ranked number one or ten thousand; your opinion is not gold! Fuck, my opinion isn’t gold!

Me: Gosh, I didn’t know it was a contest. Jeez.

Erik: If it’s a contest, we’re all losing.

Jamie laughs.

Erik: That’s kind of a relief, isn’t it?

Me: Mm hm.

Jamie: Oh my god, he’s so funny.

Erik: So, you say to them, “Well in my opinion, that color doesn’t look good on you. I’ve seen better colors on you, and I’m more attracted when you have better colors on you.”

Me: Like black and vertical stripes.

Jamie laughs.

Me: For sure.

Erik: You just flat out tell them. There’s nothing wrong with that. The way that they’re taking the information is not your responsibility. I don’t know why people get all bent out of shape about that.

Jamie: He’s showing me an image of like passing a baton.

Erik: You can’t hand something to someone, and then go, “Oh, no, no, no, no. You can’t grab it like that. Give that back to me. I’m going to do it another way, and you gotta hold it like this.” You can’t dictate how people are going to reach out and take what you’re giving. You just have to own up to that. That goes with emotional reactions. You can’t dictate how they should respond. You are not responsible. The only thing that you’re responsible for is being completely honest and forward with who you are, what you’re trying to convey, and what you want to do.

Me: Okay. Interesting.

Erik: Ta-da!

I guess that means we’re finished.