Before we proceed with tummy talk, I want to share technique Erik taught me for communicating with our deceased loved ones with yes or no questions. I may have posted this before, but a few comments after yesterday’s post made it clear that you guys need more tangible ways to reach them.

Here’s what you do: Sit down and rest your hands, palm up, on your knees. Designate one hand as your “yes” answer and your other hand as your “no” answer. You might designate a reaction in both hands as a maybe, but I don’t bother with that. I’m a black and white girl. Now grey zone for me. Then, picture your loved one in your mind and say hello, tell him or her that you love them and engage in other small talk just to get that connection going. Then, ask him or her to communicate with you by creating some sort of reaction in one hand. I tell Erik which hand is which, but I’m sure he already knows. Next, ask your question. It might take some time, but be patient. Eventually, you’ll feel a different sensation in one hand: tingling, coolness, hotness, numbness, the feeling of a breeze flowing over your palm. That’s your answer. The more you practice, the stronger that connection grows, and your ability to channel will only improve.

Okay. About belly fat. When Erik died, I guess the stress caused a surge of cortisol, making my midsection grow. How did I come to that conclusion, you ask? The cursor on my computer was acting squirrelly. It was like it had a mind of its own! Eventually, I realized that my lap pad was lopped over my trackpad taking over what my fingers were supposed to be doing. With decreased stress and more exercise, I’m winning the battle, but I asked Erik if there was any spiritual basis and any (please god) simple solutions. Here’s what he had to say:

Me: Okay, let’s talk about belly fat in men and women as they get older. The bane of my existence. Is there a spiritual basis for that? If so, how do you get rid of it? Please, please tell me, for the love of God and all things holy!

Erik (laughing): There’s definitely an energetic basis for it. Just like you hold on to belly fat, you hold on to energy that your body doesn’t need.

Me: Okay. Makes sense.

Erik: A lot of times, it’s constricting energy. It’s not like you’re holding on to it like you are with a teddy bear, because it brings comfort to you.

Jamie (laughing): He’s mimicking holding a teddy bear and petting its fur.

Erik: It’s mostly you’re holding onto it for fear that somebody might know who you are or figure you out.

Me: Oh!

Erik: So, it’s cover-up shit.

Me: Is it covering up a particular chakra? Is that what it is?

Erik (Emphatically): Absolutely. Congestion of the energetic highways and byways and chakras.

Me: Wow.

Erik: A great way to help handle that is –

(Pause)

Jamie: I was asking him, ‘Handle what? Be more clear.’

Erik: Blockages of energy—acupuncture. Then look into what the chakra provides, and then do what I say is so fucking important—emotional honesty.

Me: Oh, yeah.

Erik: Just, dude, get real. Get real with yourself. And then you’ll find that you won’t be walking around constricting those stomach muscles because you feel like they’re bulging too much. And then, of course, it relates to some of the physical things that you do such as diet. But diet really relates to how you give nutrition to yourself, which relates to how you love yourself.

Me: That’s true.

Erik: And exercise.

Me: Dammit.

Erik: Exercise relates to how comfortable you are in your body, which is also a spiritual thing. Some people get into a body and they don’t wanna move. They call those people stagnant.

Jamie (giggling): The way he said it was really funny.

Me: I don’t want to move anymore. I used to be an exercise nut, but now it’s like, ugh, I wish you hadn’t even mentioned the word, Erik. I hate you, Erik! And I was hoping you would say there’d be some chakra-cleansing thing I could do so I could eat like a pig and sit on the couch all day, but, no, you’re not going to let me slide on this one, are you?

Erik: No, I’m not. It ‘s not just how you treat yourself. It’s how you allow yourself to be treated in the environment. Everything is part of a whole. You can’t just focus on one area and expect the entire thing to heal. It’s like getting a silver platter, and it’s all old and fucked up, and you just polish a quarter size piece of it and expect the whole damn thing to look pretty.

Me: Yeah.

Erik: You know, it does affect the whole plate, but it’s not getting the plate to the level of polish that you want. You know, being a human being requires work. That’s why some of us fucking opt to get out of here.

Me (solemnly): Yeah.

Erik: We can’t logically and emotionally and physically do the work. We just can’t do it. But you can, Mom.

Me (reluctantly): Okay.

Erik: And Mom, when this gets bigger, you’re going to have to set more of an example.

Me: No pressure or anything. Will I have to go to the gym?

Erik: It’s awesome that you’re having this struggle, because you should write about this shit.

Me: What do you think I’m doing?

Erik: Nah, you don’t have to go to the gym or anything.

Me: Good, because I am NOT! Just saying. So, is there anything we can do on our own to get rid of belly fat at home, I mean, not get rid of it totally, but is there a starting exercise or something to help us clean up the energy?

Jamie: Yes, he’s already said it.

Erik: Yes. Yes! Dance. Dance to your favorite music.

Jamie (giggling): Donce! He says it really funny! Donce! It was something—rrraaa, da, da, da, da. Some Spanish thing.

I chuckle softly.

Jamie (to Erik): Nice accent, Erik!

Me: All right!

Erik: Thank you.

Jamie: Did he take Spanish?

Me: Well, yeah, but he was terrible at it, but his grandfather is from Spain, so maybe some of it rubbed off.

Jamie: Oh, I forgot about that! Yeah, he pulled out a killer accent. I don’t know what the hell he said though! He was saying, “Dance, woman, dance.”

Erik: Do this 20 minutes a day to your favorite music. I don’t care if it’s waltzing, tap, jazz, whatever. Get the whole body to move. The arms over the head, in any direction you want to go in. Just don’t hurt yourself. But it gets fresh oxygen into the muscles. It’s stretching the muscles. It’s getting your circulation to move, and when all of this happens, these are some of the physical elements that let the fat go, but also when you’re listening to your favorite music, you’re getting vibrational toning energetically, and you’re fucking happy.

Me: Wow!

Erik: You’re happy! Now, you just gotta train yourself to move to it for 20 minutes.

Me: Oh, god. Twenty whole minutes? But see, I don’t like music anymore. Ever since you died, Erik, I can’t stand to listen to it. Or read, except for when you first died, I read all about quantum physics, NDEs, proof of the afterlife and other things to figure out if you still existed and if you did, where you were. But I just can’t do it anymore. I just can’t.

(Long pause)

Me: I don’t know why.

Erik: That sucks for you.

Me (sadly): I know.

Erik: Because I like music, you can’t?

Me: No, I have no idea why. I truly don’t.

(Pause)

Jamie: I said, ‘Erik, do you know why?’ He looks at me, squints his eyes, and goes, “She’s taking one for the team.”

(Pause)

Jamie (to Erik): What team?

Erik: The Mom and Son team. It’s just a way for you to emotionally shut down. 

Me: Ach, god. Okay.

Erik: That’s torture.

Me: Well, that doesn’t sound like emotional honesty.

Erik: No, and a lot of times, you’re not emotionally honest, and that’s because you don’t know that you’re not. You know what I’m saying?

Me: Oh, yeah.

Erik: If you know it, you’re saying it.

Me: Yeah, of course. I’m a blabbermouth. I share everything about my life. TMI usually. Jamie knows that.

Jamie laughs hard. She knows only too well.

Erik: Way to compliment yourself, Mom.

I’m not sure if he’s being sarcastic or not.

Me: It is true, though. So, anything that’s a little more practical than dancing in front of everybody like a complete fool?

Erik: It doesn’t have to be in front of everybody. It can be completely by yourself.

Me: I’m never by myself!

Erik: Well, that shit’s pretty practical.

Honestly, what I really want him to say is, “Get some birch branches, sprinkle them with snake oil (which is readily available on Amazon) and say the following incantations. Then, voila, your belly fat will be gone.

Me (disappointed): Okay. Well, fine. So, that’s pretty much it?

Erik: Yeah.

Me: Okay.

Crap.

Don’t forget tonight’s radio show where Erik and Jamie will be the guests on The Sean and Jen Show at 4 PM MST/5 PM CST. Again, here are the listening details.

• www.transformationtalkradio.com and click on “Listen Now” on the right side of the home page.  A player will pop up and you may have to hit the play button.

Also, there are a couple more spots for the Grieving Parents’ Channeling Call this Thursday.  SIGN UP