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Me: Let’s talk about life reviews. You can talk about yours if you can’t talk about it in general or you can do both.

Jamie: Erik is sitting in front of me, super casual. He has his hat on. It’s still goofy, to the side. (chuckling) And I guess he’s trying to get into a real intimate conversation, because he’s leaning forward closer to me, which is behind the camera. He’s got his hands up here (in front of the camera). He’s talking and it’s like he doesn’t care that his hands are in front of his face.

Erik: Well, with the life review, I definitely remember mine because it felt like it happened forever when really it was almost instantaneously. I believe it was the first shock to the brain—right to the whole logic system—that you are superhuman and that you can think, do, remember, learn, experience and feel everything in a nanosecond that lasted an entire lifetime. It’s the first blow (sounds like belooow) to the brain that—

Me: But you don’t have a brain! What do you mean?

Erik: Mom, come on! Work with me!

Jamie giggles.

Erik: C’mon. I’m telling the story! The first “beloow” to the logic, right? That time’s not linear—that all of a sudden you can see all of this shit you’ve done, experience the emotions that you’ve had, yourself and what other people have had in reaction to your words and actions, and it happens all at once! It just totally mind fucks you.

Jamie laughs.

Me: Erik!

Erik: I’m just sayin’! It’s amazing. Now, the timing of the life review is not the same for everybody, because not everybody leaves the physical body from death, gets in line, goes through a life review, meets their loved ones, comes back to Earth, takes care of the ones that are grieving, go to your own funeral, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh. Everybody has a different picture. That’s what’s so cool about being these so-called (air quotes) individuals.

Jamie (chuckling): He air quotes that.

Erik: Even though we’re not individuals, we have this free will to have these experiences, these personalities and characters that we’ve shaped for so many decades and so many lifetimes. So when you leave your body, what happens beyond there is going to be up to your own organizational skills and what your situation needs. But you know what? You’ll definitely have a life review. People experience it a little bit differently. Like, for me, it was a little bit like a 360, uh, like a movie theater.

Jamie: Like a cyclorama. Isn’t that what they’re called?

Me: I don’t know! Sounds good. I’ll take that.

Jamie (laughing): We have one in Atlanta, which is probably the only reason I know that word.

Erik: It’s like a 360 movie theater. I remember a table being present. I remember people being with me, but it didn’t matter that other entities or people I knew or loved were in the room. I was only focusing on what I was watching and what I was experiencing. I think to an outside source it would have looked like the movie was on fast forward, but to me it was very real to life, very slow. And it wasn’t everything in my life. It’s not like a recording. It’s highlighted moments, and all of these highlighted moments play a part in, “What was your lesson on Earth?” “What was your purpose; what did you come to remember, to do, to leave behind?” Whatever it was. Some people like to call it their destiny or path and things like that. This is what you see in your life review. So—

Jamie: I don’t know. His tone just changed. He’s not looking at me. (To Erik) What are you doing?

(Long pause)

Jamie: It looks like you went down Memory Lane all of a sudden, Erik!

Me: Aw.

Jamie: It did. Um, I don’t see his eyes. I can see his hat. His hand is up like this (she covers her eyes with one hand.) His hair is kind of shaggy. It’s like he totally got lost in thought.

Me: Aw. Were you thinking about one difficult part of your life review?

Erik: There were several. (Somber pause) Yeah, it just makes it real.

(Pause)

Erik: I don’t even know what the fuck that word means, either.

Jamie: He’s not sad or anything—but extremely pensive. His energy just really calmed down, and he got really grounded.

Erik: I just want you all to know that it’s amazing, and even if you had Alzheimer’s or dementia, you fear that you’re not going to remember that great moment cuz you didn’t take a fucking picture of it. Don’t worry. It is all in here. (He points to the top of his head with one hand and pats his chest with the other.)

Jamie: He connects the head to the heart.

Erik: And you’re going to have an experience with it in your life review. What’s interesting is after you go through this remembering phase, this life review, you’re not kicked out on your own. It’s not like they let your ass out of the theater and you go walk the streets by yourself.

Jamie (giggling): The visual was really funny on that one.

Erik: You have this support team with you, and I remember not knowing who these individuals were, but I remember knowing that it was okay, that they were there just for me. It wasn’t like going to see a doctor and a specialist like yeah, you know that they’re there in that career and they’re going to help you? Nah, it’s more like if you’ve been away from home for so long and you finally get to go home and see your mom or see your grandma or your granddad, and it’s like you love them so much. You know them, but you’ve missed the details of their life. That’s the only way I know how to explain it. They’re there for you, and they let you lead the conversation. You know, “What did you need help with? What did you need to understand? What did you feel like you needed to do?” It’s not guided by them at all, and it’s crazy, cuz none of them are judging you or telling you that you’re right or you’re wrong and how many you got right and what the fuck you did wrong, grading you A+ or B-. Hell, I would have gotten a D.

Me: Aw. Well, that’s passing!

Jamie laughs.

Erik: Thank god they didn’t do grades!

Me: Yeah, you weren’t too crazy about those.

Erik: It’s so wild, though, cuz you’re not getting judged. And it’s your first interaction with the afterlife. Time is definitely not linear which can just turn you upside down. It’s amazing. And it’s your first emotional interaction where—you’re not human. You know, they’re not looking to get something from you or to teach you or point a finger in your face. It’s an embracing moment, and it’s weird cuz your human brain pops up every once in a while a goes, “Okay, what do you want? What do you want from this? How much do I have to pay you for this?”

Me (chuckling): When is the other shoe going to drop, huh?

Erik: Yeah. Yeah, you know, where’s the string? You start looking for shit like that, and as soon as you start looking for it, you know that it’s useless. You have to train yourself out of being human.

Me: Can you share one of the most painful parts of your life review?

Jamie: He looks up at me and goes, “Seriously, Mom?”

Me: Well, one that’s not embarrassing?

(Very long pause)

Me: There’s got to be something you want to share with millions of YouTube viewers!

Jamie: No, his lips are on lockdown.

Me: Okay, so that’s pretty personal. Okay, let me ask you in general terms. Let’s say you beat up somebody, all right? Now, when you go through that in your life review, what do you feel? Do you get everything from their viewpoint? Tell me about that. Let’s use that as an example.

Erik: Yeah, you get your own viewpoint, their viewpoint, and you get this above and beyond third viewpoint. And not only do you get the viewpoints, you get the emotions that are attached to it.

Me: Do you get everything—the senses, taste, smell, you know, almost like a physical type remembrance?

Erik: No, because it’s not so much the physical response that’s important. It’s the internal thoughts and the emotional reactions.

Me: Okay. Can you actively participate in your life review by changing things since there’s not linear time. It seems like you should be able to preempt the mistakes you make, and your multiple selves in their simultaneous lives can download or upload all of the information you learn in that life review so that those other selves can apply it to their parallel lives. Right?

Erik: Yes, but you don’t really do that the first go round. This is work that you can do on yourself once you’re stable in the new dimension where you’ve ended up. Then, yes, you can tap back in to these life review styles, adapt, change and create new patterns.

Me: And you do this in parallel lives, right? So if you beat up somebody, then you can change that in your other self in another life so that it doesn’t occur?

Erik: Yes.

Me: Oh, that’s amazing. Do you have to deal with situations where, when you make amends with that person [before you die] do you sill have to deal with that in the life review? I mean, if you beat up that person, but you apologized and everything was cool, do you still have to go through that painful experience in your life review?

Erik: Well, you’ve already done your life review, right? Because the fixing and repairing comes after your life review.

Me: Mm hm.

Erik: So, you’re asking if after I repair it in a parallel life, can I go back and watch the life review and just see the highlighted viewpoints?

Me: No. I’m talking about if, in real life, you punch somebody in the face and then you come back a day later and say, “I’m really sorry, Dude. I shouldn’t have done that. What can I do to make this right?” Then is that still something you have to deal with in your life review? Does that still come up?

Erik: It depends if that punch in the face was related to a life lesson or purpose, path, destiny—those kinds of things—in that guy’s life. If it was a part of it then, yeah, you still get to witness the punch in the face, and you’ll probably get to witness the, “I’m sorry” afterwards to see how it was mending or healed and what you gained from that activity or that circumstance.

Me: Plus you’ll also get to see the viewpoint of the person that was punched, right? The emotions during, the emotions after when you make the amends and so on.

Erik: You got it!

Me: All right. Erik, anything else on life reviews that you want to talk about?

Erik: Nope. We’re golden, and we’re at time.

Me: All right. Thank you, Jamie.

Jamie: You’re welcome, Elisa.

Erik: I love you, Mom!

Me: Aw, Erik, I love you, and thank you so much for this. I appreciate it.

Erik: No problem.

Me: Jamie, you probably look prettier than he does, Mister Shaggy Hair.

Erik: I don’t know about that.

Jamie (laughing): He’s challenging me to a bikini contest.

Me: Ew. That gives me a bad visual.

Jamie: That’s terrible. His humor is just off the charts.

***********************

Dear Reader,

The journey on which you’re about to embark will take you through stories that are deeply personal and involves a relationship between a mother and her son.

As a physician raised by two atheists, I had no personal belief system about life after death. In a word, I was a confirmed skeptic. As my journey progressed, my mind opened. It is my sincerest hope that yours will open as well and that you will have a greater understanding of your own life and what’s to come ahead.

Although Erik sometimes paints a rosy picture of the afterlife, time and time again he stresses that suicide is not the answer to one’s problems. If you struggle, please understand that the information in my blog and my book is no substitute for professional help. Please click here for a list of resources for help when you find yourself considering taking your own life. Know that they are readily available when you feel that hopelessness and despair that many of us feel from time to time in our lives.

I refuse all donations and ad revenue on the blog. It is my dream to one day establish a nonprofit organization that delivers a variety of spiritual services for those who have lost loved ones to suicide and cannot afford that assistance on their own. It’s a mission of love, sacrifice, and dedication.

Love and light,

Elisa