Letting Go

Well, the eye surgery went well, except my sight is super blurry. I can barely check emails or texts. Thank God we have a wonderful guest blogger to save the day. I hope my vision improves so I can post tomorrow. Keep your fingers crossed! Thanks Donnalynn for sharing your insight on what, for me, is the hardest lesson of all.

Hi Channeling Erik Family,

Elisa has kindly invited me to introduce myself. My name is Donnalynn Civello and I am a Wellness Coach (Emotional/Spiritual Wellbeing and Holistic Nutrition) from New York City. I am a close client of Jamie’s and have worked with her for almost 10 years now and I refer many of my own clients to her.

I just wanted to reach out and tell you all how much I admire and respect the sense of community here. I read the blog everyday and have done since the beginning. This community has given me SO MUCH inspiration for my own spiritual teachings to clients and students (as I am a yoga teacher as well as a coach).

My work is to help people live better lives everyday and to give them inspiration along their path. I focus on understanding your soul’s purpose and learning your life lessons. Once you understand what you are here to do, the rest falls into place! I work with a few spiritual teachers and much of those teachings (including many of Erik’s teachings) are incorporated into my weekly “spiritual words of wisdom for living” blog.

I thought I would share those teachings with you. Maybe they will provide you with some inspiration to live the best life you can.

Ethereal Wellness Blog

If you ever have any questions, you can always reach out to me:

With love,

Donnalynn Civello

Email: dcivello@ethereal-wellness.com

Website: http://ethereal-wellness.com/

Twitter: @dlcivello

Letting Go

Erik inspires me every day to look at life at a higher level spiritually – not just in human terms. Things are not always as they appear to be. In fact, they seldom are. As humans we have a tendency to attach to things or people for a sense of security, purpose or a sense of identity. And what happens to us when we lose those things or people? Where does that leave us?

In Elisa’s recent post on “Soul Mates,” Erik challenges us with his notion of what a real soul mate is and/or does for us and how it is important for us to let them go once they have left our lives. As he says, “…There are the road signs. You know, you drive by them on the highway; they give you direction. They’re in the right spot; they give you accurate information. If they weren’t there, you’d get lost, but you keep on moving. That was their purpose, in that moment in time, to encourage you to be a better you, and the MOMENT MOVES ON. Why would you be selfish enough to think that that person should stay in your life long term because it was magical for a moment?”

Erik is right. Why do we expect that people should always stay in our lives just because we once had a magical moment with them? Soul mates serve many purposes and many of them are to dish up our life lessons – throw us into a state of emotional chaos and leave us to do the work on ourselves. This should not be seen as trauma, but as a gift – an opportunity for our souls to achieve great advancement. This is what we are here for – to learn.

Erik’s insights help us to understand the BIGGER PICTURE of why we are here and how we can go about understanding the true meaning of our lives beyond what is seen with our human eyes.

In my counseling, I find that clients have a hard time with letting go in general – especially when they come across a soul mate. Through their pain, I hear Erik’s words echo in my mind and somehow I always know what to say to them. Erik has taught me that nothing ever leaves your life unless it is time for it to do so. And if you are living in the past, you are living for a moment that HAS passed. Time to pick it up and move forward. Your life is always ahead of you; you cannot move forward if you are continually looking behind you.

As always, Erik’s words inspire my own weekly teachings (with my clients and yoga students) and in particular this week’s teaching – “Staying Too Long.” http://etherealwellness.wordpress.com/2013/06/03/staying-too-long/

With the gift of Erik and Jamie’s wisdom and the wisdom of my spiritual teachers, I am happy to share some of these teachings with the Channeling Erik Family. Maybe they will give you all a bit of inspiration on your journey.




For more information on donnalynn’s counseling services, go to



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Elisa Medhus

  • M&M

    Very nice Donnalynn, thank you for sharing this. I was one of those people who could not let things go, they just stuck with me and it took everything I had to get over something. A comment, an action, a break up, it didn’t matter. I was this way most of my life until I realized just how draining and unproductive it was. With several years of recent soul searching and deep self introspection I realized, that for me- this may not be the case for anyone else- but for me I did this because I have an inherent longing for “home”, for a place of unconditional love and support and transparency. I was looking outside myself for that, because that is what we learn when we are young, and it wasn’t there. So I got angry, frustrated, and hung on to the “it’s so wrong” bit because I couldn’t understand why things weren’t the way I needed them to be.

    Anyway, for anyone working on letting go and finding it difficult, I would suggest looking deep within to discover the reason. It might not be what you think and once you find the reason, it’s a lot easier to forgive yourself and let what you are hanging on to float away.

    Thank you for the post, Donnalynn, There is always something new to learn and this is an excellent topic. And best wishes for a full and speedy recovery, Elisa. Wishing you peace and relaxation in the mean time.

  • Dawn Anton

    I’m very happy that your eye surgery went well, Elisa.
    I hope that the next one is a great success too. Wishing you a speedy recovery. <3

  • sylvia


    You must read this article (or have someone read it to you!) that appeared
    in The Daily Mail today. Dr. Brian Weiss’s daughter was relieved of potentially blinding cataracts after undergoing a past life regression session. It’s sad that
    it takes an online news agency with a somewhat dubious reputation to print this. Really intriguing!


  • donnalynn

    Oh, thank you so much for sharing your experience, “M&M”. Letting go IS one of the hardest parts of the human experience. I have had my round of it as well. We all do. But you are very right, we always look outside of ourselves for the answers, and they are NEVER THERE. When we remember who we truly are and we go inside and really trust that, we ALWAYS find our way home. Thanks for sharing. 🙂 Always, donnalynn

  • bridget

    Thanks for sharing Donnalynn! I agree, letting go has been one of the hardest challenges in my life. Not so much with relationships, but with experiences in my life. Things in my childhood caused me pain and hurt, and for some silly reason I still want to lug that suitcase around with me, instead of recognizing the lessons and gifts from it, and moving on. I lost my way for a few years in my life..hitting rock bottom, and at times, I bring that silly suitcase of guilt, shame, and regret with me, allowing that time in my life to define who I am now. It is a constant challenge to not slip into victim mentality. The victim mentality doesnt want to unpack those suitcases, it sees them as a ‘badge of honor’ a way to identify itself, letting go is its worst enemy. When I practice living from my heart instead of my head, I can see all the gifts from these experiences, I can see that they made me stronger, made me more empathetic to others, made me a great listener and helper for others in need, and makes me realize that getting lost was the best way to find myself. It is a constant challenge, but one with great rewards, slowly but surely practicing letting go is chipping away at the mold I had put myself in, allowing my true self to be set free.

  • Sarah Corrigan

    Donnalynn, thank you! It’s such a delight to see your words on here! Your yoga classes and teachings have been huge inspirations through the years to me and it is so cool to know that at least some of your amazing balance and energy is rooted in Eric as well 🙂

    Sarah @ New York yoga ~

  • Tiggg

    So glad the surgery went well Elisa 🙂 And thanks donnalynn for all your wonderful words of inspiration.

  • donnalynn

    Thanks so much for your comments, Bridget. I LOVE your quote – I am going to use it in my classes – “getting lost is the best way to find yourself.” Brilliant. But, yes, about victims… such a beautiful and insightful observation you made. I have to say (and I am sure Erik has said this before!!) – “there are NO victims in life, there are only those who do not want to rise to their lessons.” It makes you think twice about ever considering yourself a victim. 🙂 Thanks for sharing! xo donnalynn

    • Bridget

      Thank you! That phrase has helped me find so much peace in my life:)


  • donnalynn

    Oh yeah, Sarah!! What a small world that I would run into a New York Yogi! But there are never any coincidences, only synchronicities! I believe as souls, we travel in soul groups – this is why we run into each other time and time again. Some people are just meant to be in your life – either to teach you, guide you, partner with you, “torture” you, etc….! We are all vibrationally connected and the universe always draws like vibrations together. Hope to see you in class soon! Always, xo donnalynn

  • Nancy Antia

    So everything went fine with the surgery. Good!

    This is a quote from Audrey Hepburn I found when searching for a poem about the eyes to send it to you. Hope you like it.

    For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak
    only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you
    are never alone.

    Audrey Hepburn quotes

  • Gwen Yarbrough

    Elisa….happy to hear your surgery went well…
    Donnalynn….Thank you so much for posting this topic and all that you shared!
    This reminds me of a quote (Jack Canfield) that I wrote down on a sticky note a few months ago so I could see it and knew what it “really” meant. So again, another thing to be grateful for! :))
    There is freedom when I am not attaching people, place and things to goals that I have. Letting go of ‘controlling others is a good place to start’!
    Just the other day I was making decision that involves another person in my life….I was feeling anxious and a bit confused in doing so…..
    And then I realized I needed to stop and ask myself “What do I want that would bring HAPPINESS to me”? And the moment I “let go” of what the other person might think or do …..I got clear about my decision….no more anxiety or confusion on my part!!
    And I want to thank M&M and Bridget for sharing their experiences…


  • Bridget

    Elisa, this has nothing to do with this post, but I remember the post not too long ago about coffee and wanted to share this with you and anybody else struggling with the coffee thing! A couple weeks ago I read something about matcha green tea http://living-qi.com/discover-living-qi-matcha/ and was immediately intrigued! Looked into it some more but was hesitant to get it since it had caffeine in it, (which does not agree with me) but it said it does not give the jitters, more of a “relaxed, balanced energy” Buddhist Monks drank it before meditation. Before I could order it, my sister out of the blue gives me a can of this” weird tea somebody told her to buy” she says..I love synchronicity:) Anyway, this stuff is awesome, gives an amazing feeling of mental and physical well-being, I feel more focused, and full of energy (No Jitters!) and peaceful. And the health benefits are too long to list!! Im hooked!! Just wanted to share!

  • donnalynn

    Thanks so much Tiggg and Gwen for your comments. 🙂 Gwen, you are so very right… letting go of people’s perceptions of you and what is right for you is the key to living life on your terms. I tell my clients/students this all the time. It doesn’t matter what people think about you. IT MATTERS WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT YOU. End of story. Never prioritize other’s perceptions of you over your own perceptions. What you buy into is yours. You have to ask yourself if it is really want you want. I wrote a teaching on this last year – “Comparisons don’t feed the soul.” Sometimes we can’t let go of comparing ourselves to others or wanting their approval, but success in life only comes from living in the SELF, not for someone else. Check it out! Always, xo donnalynn

    “Comparisons Don’t Feed the Soul”

  • donnalynn

    Bridget! You get the award for inspiring and “on the mark” comments this week! LOL!! Definitely – green matcha tea! I am also a holistic nutritionist and I specifically take clients off coffee (too acidic for the body) and put them on green tea as a mild stimulant. It does have caffeine for sure, but it is a more alkaline form of caffeine so it is cleaner and kinder to the body while still giving you energy. Enjoy!! xo donnalynn

    • Bridget

      haha..thanks!:) I wish I would have found it sooner! Could I email you a quick nutrition question? I changed my diet up a bit, and would love your opinion on it!

  • donnalynn

    Hi Bridget! Yes, of course! You can email me anytime about a nutrition question! I am always here for you guys – any questions you have just email me at dcivello@ethereal-wellness.com or post it to the channeling erik facebook page and I will answer it! Talk soon! xo donnalynn

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