Ascended Master-Baitors

Erik Skywalker

So my dear, mutual Erik friends, our young man got me good.  Oh yes, he did.  I didn’t think it would happen, but wow.  WOW is all I can say.

When I began talking to Erik, I received a number of kind-hearted emails “warning” me of Erik’s impending antics.  Get ready!  He’s such a prankster – he’ll moon you!  He’ll stink up the place!  He’ll do something to shock you!

Pshaw.  I am a child of the 90s, people.  We invented the phrase “whatever.”

Well around that time, I managed to lose a set of earphones.  It was a minor inconvenience, and I’ve been borrowing my Sweetie’s earphones, leaving her without music for her jogging.  We looked *everywhere* for the freaking things, but we didn’t really think much of it.  Stuff gets lost, right?  They’ll turn up eventually.

This afternoon (Friday) at work, I pulled my iPhone out of my scrubs shirt pocket and not one but TWO sets of ear phones were wrapped around the device.

There is NO WAY those earphones were in that pocket this morning.  That would mean that they had been in the scrub shirt and gone through the industrial hospital washer and dryer.  I have washed earphones before and seen what happened to them – these earphones were NOT in the scrub top when I put it on in the morning.

I also distinctly remember having those earphones at home before I lost them.  I listen to them at work, and then I listen to them as I ride my bike home from work – if I’d left them in my scrub top, I would have noticed immediately!

SOMEONE put those earphones in my shirt pocket WHILE I WAS WEARING IT!!  I didn’t figure out it was Erik until I got home and told the story to Sweetie, and suddenly remembered one of those “warning” emails – He hides stuff!  Then I knew it – I just KNEW it was him!

Erik just blew my mind-hole, people.  I have seen and heard some amazing signs and confirmations from some of these spirit friends, but never has anyone actually transported an object from one location ON TO MY PERSON!  I am so freaking impressed with Erik right now.

I thought you folks would enjoy that.  You were right, he got me!  ANYWAY!  On to our topic…

There’s a bit of a lead-in to this conversation with Erik:  a while back, I had a crazy-vivid dream about Erik.  (Not *that* kind of dream, Erik, sheesh.)  He was very proud to share he had been “promoted”.  Chuffed is the best word for this feeling of pride and growth.  The visual is Erik in a white robe thing, (he clarified not a poufy night shirt – a COOL robe) standing next to John Lennon.

That dream sparked two weeks of discussion and today’s entry.

The thing about that visual, Erik next to John just radiating pride, it really stuck with me and I felt like I was missing something.  The message was incomplete – he was promoted, but by who and to what?

I shared this dream with a lovely friend (who doesn’t identify as a psychic or a medium but has no trouble talking to Erik.)  She turned to Erik and asked him to clarify.

“He says it’s not in your dictionary.  I’ll meditate later and see if I can get more.”

She emailed me the next morning:

“Last night he explained that he’s in a training program for Ascended Masters – that’s why you saw him with John… he’s trying to figure out how to get that sort of program “Approved” on his side – much like an independent studies program at a university here on earth.”

Well, I had a pretty strong reaction; nothing curdles my yoghurt more than the term “ascended master”.  I responded quickly and rashly:

“I call bullshit on the *ascended master* thing – that there is a place or rank where some people go that leaves others behind?  Bullshit. 

And pardon my crassness, but who the fuck “approves” these things anyway?  That’s another thing I don’t buy – that there is an approval process or a form of government.  This does not make sense to me right now.  Not with the words we’re using.  I need different words.  I can’t subscribe to a vernacular that makes others feel separate.”

Yeah, I was kinda pissed, (and we know anger is really a fear reaction!)   As I signed off the last email, I found myself tearing up!  This idea of “masters” holding the power to “approve programs” in the afterlife is a distressing concept to me, and I think it is to others, as well.  So that’s what we’re talking about this week!


Okay, so it’s like this.  You can pick any words you want to use, and if you come across something that bugs you, you just take a look at why it’s bugging you.  In your case, you have this problem with authority (huge approving grin) which is an improvement, by the way (in comparison to my previous fears of authority).

So fuck the whole “ascended master” thing, if it turns you off.  Just think of me as a cool Luke Skywalker! 

Isn’t Luke Skywalker kind of cool by himself?

(Shows me Luke spent a lot of time whining in the first movie – yeah he was a whiner, you’re right Erik.) And Luke, right, HE had a problem with authority too – dude didn’t finish his Jedi training with Yoda, left early, and nearly fucked over the entire universe as a result.

Pause while Erik & I have a minor debate about the plot of the movie.  To my horror, it becomes clear that Star Wars is actually a dated cultural reference, and it’s not nearly as cool to Erik’s generation as it was to mine or my parents’.  I think that’s because you guys saw the Star Wars remakes, and the prequels-

Okay, yeah, we’re not here to talk about Star Wars – the point is, you can choose whatever language you need.

You can talk about archetypes, enlightenment, ascended masters, wtf-ever, it doesn’t matter what words you choose because they’re HUMAN words, and we just don’t use that language (in heaven).  It’s all about translating these brain-downloads of understanding / expansion and those people are trying to use human words to share the feeling with other people who are seeking it out.  But what do you tell people about meditation?

I tell them that they need to find something that’ll work for them, whether it’s walking in nature, dancing, exercising before they sit down to be still, focusing on a tactile sensation rather than using visualization techniques – just keep looking until you find something that works.

Well it’s the same thing with language.  You get all puckered up when you think about the “ascended master” thing, but you’re fine when you think about the exact same concept using the words “jedi knight”!

Well, I guess I’d trust a jedi knight, more than an ascended master.  The very definition of “ascended master” is someone who is high up/above, who has “mastered” something.  There’s this sense of separation and superiority, which I do not buy.  I’ve heard Jesus referred to as an ascended master, but I don’t think Jesus ever referred to himself as *anyone’s* master.  If that were true, does that mean he’s just done with his own expansion?  His only gig now is to help the rest of us?

One of Erik’s friends on the other side gives me this visual:  there are cycles of completion.  Think of a fractal – one section of the fractal, when magnified, reveals many repetitions of the same pattern.  The same thing is shown when you “zoom out” to see a larger picture.  When a cycle of expansion is completed,  you have perfected the pattern in one section, this particular block of the snowflake.  There is expansion going on in the next level of the fractal, but that is not visible nor relevant to those of us working in this dimension.  Thank you for this, it’s very helpful. 

Erik, who the eff is supervising you?  I heard reference to someone telling you to cut out the haunting pranks and start doing some good.  That thought irritated me to no end.

Yeah, well, it’s not like (how you’re thinking about it, a teacher informing a student he needs to cut it out or he’ll get detention.)  It’s like this:  (shows me a teacher / guide / friend simply showing him the possible expansion and positive outcomes if he applied his energy in this other way – and it’s so amazing and huge how could you not do it?)

I just said it like, I got the smack-down, because (it’s comforting to others) to (feel like he has some guidance, limits, supervision which is also a form of love.)

Yeah, I get that.

So you don’t need to take that personally, if the thought of me getting’ a talking to creeps you out about the afterlife, because *you* will not get any sort of treatment that’ll make you feel like how you’re feeling right now.  I just got it because I need/like it.  It works for me, it doesn’t work for you.  That’s just fine, girl!  You will be alright!

I can’t believe you’re reassuring me about the afterlife, dude.  That’s my job!

It’s so funny that I still have these little anxieties, eh?  I *know* intellectually that what you create on the other side is born from your own consciousness, what you need, what you expect.  Yet here I am, getting tripped up by this concept of rank, or someone being “in charge”.

No one’s in charge of you but you, and you know they (his teachers/guides/friends) couldn’t make me do a single thing (if he wasn’t inclined to do it, out of his own motivation for expansion.)

Thank you, Erik.  This has been a huge relief.

Love you, babe!  Love you too, E.

And I’m grateful and delighted that Erik didn’t give up his prankster ways.

Kate Sitka is a spirit medium and animal communicator.  To find out more, please visit her professional website and personal blog

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