Talking to Loved Ones and Helping Teenagers

We have a new housekeeping service that comes in every couple of weeks (except they don’t do laundry. Drats.) and Lukas told me that they forgot to do part of the upstairs. So I texted her, ‘Hi! Did you forget to do one of the rooms upstairs and the hallway?’ She responded in Spanish with something like, “Why do you keep disturbing the peace, offending me and spreading your venom?” Actually, it was much longer than that, but that’s just the gist. So I replied with, ‘I’m sorry. I meant no offense! My intentions were good!’ I was really nice because, although she’s only been to our house twice, I like her a lot. Her energy is really sweet. Plus, it’s hard to find someone good and trustworthy. She texted me back, horrified, saying the text was not meant for me! How embarrassing for her. I just texted her back, ‘Ja ja, no problema.’ 

So for today’s Best of Erik, we have two topics. Both are pretty short. Tomorrow, I’ll post the last segment in our Climate Change series. 

COMMUNICATING WITH OUR DECEASED LOVED ONES

Me: How can we communicate more easily and more effortlessly with the nonphysical so that when our loved one’s transition does take place, we don’t feel so bereft.

I mumble under my breath, trying to make sense of the reader’s question.

Erik: I think when we’re looking at easy, I wanna remind people when you’re happy, when you’re in a good emotional place, it’s easier for the deceased to communicate with the living. When you’re under a wall of grief or under a wall of confusion, it’s very hard for us to communicate to you. That vibration, it’s really messed up, you know, so it’s herd for us to get there. Another way to make it easy is to dedicate time to us. Say, “All right. I’m going to sit still. I’m going to get quiet. I’m going to let you get closer to me. I’m not going to push you away. Most people don’t think that they’re pushing us away, but trust me, they are.

Me: Mm hm.

Erik: You know, they’re scared. “Oh, don’t do that! Oh!” Or they start to feel at peace, and they think that if they’re at peace, it’s a disservice to the person who’s dead, because then they’re not grieving over them.

Me: Oh yeah.

Erik: There’s a lot of really strange rewiring systems in the whole grieving process, so I’d say, get happy. Find moments of happiness, and when you’re in a moment of happiness, dedicate stillness to us.

HELPING TEENAGERS

Me: Okay. Here’s the last question for the day. Erik, what would you say to a classroom of teenagers who were more interested in sex, drugs and guns and are mostly angry, pissed off and don’t want to be in school?

Erik: Oh, do I have to say something to them?

Me: Yeah, well, I don’t know. What would you say if you had to?

Erik: I would say, ‘Enjoy having a short life, because that’s what it’s going to give you.’

Me: Mm hm.

Erik: I would say, um, ‘Outward focus isn’t the greatest success story.’ I would encourage them to go inward. If they really wanna fight and party and get loud, go into the depths that are inside of them first.

(Long pause)

Me (in a mock timid voice): More…please.

Erik: They’d have to have a teacher or instructor to help them do it.

Me: Can you address maybe why they should be traveling that route?

Erik: Oh, that’s like a whole hour! We could totally break that down, cuz just to sit down and group guns, drugs, partying and everything under one umbrella, they’re attracted to certain things because of their energetic vibration, and all of those things are extremely different. I mean, if you want me to address one of those groups, we can sit down and write a lecture if you want.

Me: No, I don’t want to do that, but give me a little bit more.

Erik: I mean, it’s known in psychiatry and psychology and all that shit that if you’re going outward in these ways to seek joy or control, you’re actually displaced emotionally on the inside of yourself. I feel like I’ve said it before. All of the answers are inside of you. You already know everything. But we’re young and people don’t know—well, young kids don’t know—that doing that kind of inner discovery is healthy. They think it’s for losers or people who are weak, but in fact, having that kind of mindset that it’s for losers and for weak people, that shows weakness.

Erik chuckles.

Erik: Ignorance. You know, it really should be part of an elementary school program. All of this learning who you are and how you learn and the discovery of life and the environment around you? I mean, that’s like pre-K to 4th grade! We’re missing the glory years in these children, teaching them how to be emotionally honest, good communicators, and to go inward to find answers. And that pausing, my friend? Pausing. A mere pause can save your day.

Me: That’s true. It might have saved yours.

Long silence.

Erik: True dat, Mom.

Enjoy your Thursday!

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Elisa Medhus


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