Finding Your Life’s Purpose

Today is a nasty day. Rain. Thunder, Flash Flood Warning. Cozy. I actually love it. This afternoon, Rune drives to Crescent, TX to race his motorcycle, so Bella and I will have the house to ourselves. Both he and Lukas come home late Saturday, so it’s just enough time for me not to get lonely. Of course, when I’m by myself, I never eat well. It’s a social thing for me. Last time this happened I ate Cheerios for every meal. 

Enjoy this post, something I think 100% of us can benefit from.

Me: Are there things we can do to help us learn our purpose for this life we’re in?

Jamie repeats the question to herself.

Erik: My top three. For my top three things that we can do: Learn how to identify your emotions. If you can’t identify it, then you don’t know the definition of the emotion. You have to know the definition of the emotion to be able to recognize it and identify it. Number two: I would train myself to feel first before thinking, and that’s (using Jamie’s quote) “Self first is not self-ish.”

Jamie (laughing): I think Grace or Maitland taught me that, but anyways…

Erik: When you feel first, you’re doing for self first, and that’s going to make your decisions. That’s why I like number two so much, but you can’t do number two if you can’t do number one.

Me: Yeah, of course!

Erik: And number three—

(Long pause as Jamie clarifies something)

Jamie (to Erik): And that’s to help with life purpose and all that ja— Okay. I’m not arguing! It’s PLAY, and that’s written in all capital letters.

Erik: My definition of “play” today is do an action every day where time becomes lost, where you forget about time. That’s our reset button. For many people, it might be meditation or yoga or running, you know, an exercise regimen.


Erik: For many people it’s something creative. For many it’s gardening, um—

Me: What did it used to be for you?


Erik: Oh, speed. The wind in my face. Being in control over my –

Jamie: He says “bike” but he’s showing me a motorcycle in my head.

Erik: Even younger than that, being on a bicycle.

Jamie: That looks like a dirt bike in my head, not a ten-speed.

It’s probably a BMX bike. That was his thing.

Erik: Or being in my truck. Something where I was in control and I could take it anywhere.

Me: Those and mechanical tasks like re-spoking bicycle wheels and putting lift kits on your friends’ trucks.

Erik (joking): Fixing things!

Me: I remember he used to love messing with the wiring on his truck, and one time he blew a fuse. I sent him to the automotive store with my credit card to buy a new one for what should have been no more than 5 bucks, and he came back hours later with a six or seven hundred dollar audio system installed. Expensive freaking fuse.

Jamie laughs hard.

Me: I mean, you don’t think I would have noticed? He said he was planning to sell his bike so he was good for it, but…

Erik: I wasn’t going to waste that opportunity!

Me: I know! I guess not!

Erik: Yeah, that kind of work? I loved it. I lost time.

Me: So what else?

Erik: Those are my top three.

Me: I like those.

Erik: These are easy enough for everybody to understand, and they’re easy enough for them to learn to do on their own. They don’t have to seek a therapist or somebody who is more knowledgeable. This is the free stuff you can do.

Me: Yeah!

Erik: It puts you in the game again, centered.

Me: You’ve gotten so wise, Erik, for a little wise ass!

Jamie (chuckling): He turned around—he’s got board shorts on today—and he pushes his ass up in the air.


Enjoy this next poster from the ever-talented, Terese Newman! Just beautiful!


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Elisa Medhus

  • Bruce

    This is about the twentieth time the quote on the poster above has been cited in this blog. I just want to say that I think it is too pat, too absolute …… leaves no room for shading, nuance, individual experience or discussion. It’s too rigid; I don’t agree with it.

    • Patrick

      Please add the nuance subtlety and shading – colors really – that would expand it.

      • Stephanie

        I went along with it until the last few lines, that chaos is the root of all, and that harmony is the equal opposite of chaos. I don’t see that…chaos always yields order, no? I think of chaos as letting go and letting God. But you see, maybe its semantics–actually I think its ALL semantics, in the beginning was the WORD, and it may actually be that the perception of “order” and dependence upon it (prejudice) that is the root of all that “bad” stuff. But maybe not.

      • Bruce

        I would not expand it …… I would abandon it. This tinker toy presentation where one piece neatly connects to another is simplistic. The image of a web or even a root ball is closer. There are many strands and for some a given strand will be dominant, but that will not be true for everyone.

    • Mary Coker

      Generally I feel the same way about it. It makes me not want to fit into it’s hierarchy of emotional developments, but it does help to remind of us how emotions and our reactions do “build up” and correlate so to speak. But yeah, kinda on the same team with you on this one.

  • cristina

    i’ve been drawing those kind of shapes like Terese Newman did, since I was a child – no idea if they mean anything 🙂

    • Patrick

      “They depict energy flow as it occurs in the fourth and fifth dimensions.”

      So say my guides.

      • Denise

        Cool. Look at Indian art. This style is in much of their design. Those rus know the deal.

    • Stephanie

      Are you a ’60s child? So poignant. The images of the psychedelic era. (I was not into psychedelics, but I thik a lot of wonderful imagery took shape during that time frame).

  • Alphonso de Barbo

    #…to feel first before thinking…
    Actually, it’s far better to think first before feeling in my view… basing all our decisions on ‘feeling’ is to wishy washy for my taste!

    • We are emotional beings. We are made of emotional energy. We have to tap into our intuition/feelings and allow that to create a thought and that thought can create a response. If you have a thought first and let that evoke some random emotion that then creates a response, you often ask for a problem. That’s when people are at risk of making irrational decisions.

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